Don't Marry Thomas Clark Read Online Free

‘does the idea of marrying her really seem so terrifying to you?’
    â€˜Have you lost your mind too?’
    â€˜Listen, it looks to me like you don’t have a choice. But with the life you lead you’d only have to see her, what? Two or three times a week? You can carry on with your routine undisturbed and, if you really don’t want a wife, just consider her a flatmate that you have to establish a peaceful cohabitation with.’
    â€˜If she was just a flatmate, I wouldn’t be forced to sleep with her!’ answers Thomas.
    â€˜Thomas, let’s be frank – they’re not asking you to donate a kidney. And it says here that you have to share a bedroom with her, but it doesn’t say what you have to do once the lights are off.’
    â€˜Haven’t you read further down? I have to be faithful for the duration of the marriage. Are you expecting me to live like a monk for ten years?’
    â€˜If you’re discreet about it you won’t run any risks. Proving the infidelity of a spouse is much more difficult than movies and TV shows would have you believe.’
    â€˜That still leaves one crucial detail,’ whispers Thomas barely audibly, forcing Frank to lean over his desk to be able to hear it.
    â€˜What?’
    â€˜That I have no intention of getting married, and even if I did, it would never be to Sandy Price!’ shouts Thomas suddenly into his ear, making him jump.
    â€˜So what is the problem, then?’ asks Frank, unable to understand his friend’s reaction, ‘Is she ugly?’
    â€˜Oh…’ mumbles Thomas. ‘It’s not as if she’s hideous. She’s small, pale, skinny…’ He tries to describe her with an expression somewhere between indifference and contempt.
    â€˜OK, but she’s not repulsive.’
    â€˜No,’ he is forced to admit, albeit reluctantly. ‘She’s not actually repulsive. ’
    â€˜Well, then? Come on, you only have to put up with having her around the house. The worst that can happen is that she puts Laura Ashley curtains up in the study,’ jokes Frank, trying to put his friend’s worries into perspective.
    â€˜You’ve no idea what we’re dealing with,’ Thomas says. ‘You don’t have the faintest idea of what it means to spend more than a couple of minutes with that… that psycho! She ruined my childhood and adolescence. Just imagine, I used to spend all the time before the summer holidays in a cold sweat,’ he admits, his head in his hands. ‘Why?’ he asks miserably. ‘Why me? This can’t be happening… not to me. Anyone but her.’
    â€˜Psycho? What do you mean? Thomas, look, if she has mental health problems we can petition the court. I’m sure that with a proper psychiatric report…’
    â€˜No, no…’ says Thomas slowly, swinging his head despondently. ‘She’s sharper than the two of us put together, believe me.’
    â€˜Then you’d better start getting used to the idea,’ suggests Frank in no uncertain terms, placing his hands palm down on the desk to either side of his laptop. ‘If you want to inherit your grandfather’s fortune, you don’t have a choice.’
    â€˜No…’ moans Thomas, in last, desperate denial.
    â€˜Have it your way, then. Maybe you’re right. I’m sure you won’t end up homeless. How much do you stand to lose? Let’s have a look…’ He opens the testament in the middle and scans through a few lines. ‘Wow…’ he bursts out in amazement at the sight of all those zeros in a line. ‘That’s a nice little nest egg! Who did he say it would all go to? The Thames Bowling Club?’
    â€˜Oh, give it a rest!’ says Thomas, throwing a pen at Frank, which his friend dodges with a chuckle.
    â€˜What’s the matter? You rather he’d bequeathed it to the cricket team?’ But he