Minecraft: Diary of a Minecraft Zombie Book 4: Zombie Swap (An Unofficial Minecraft Book) (Minecraft, Minecraft Books, Minecraft Books for Kids, Minecraft Diary, Minecraft Handbook, Herobrine) Read Online Free Page B

they missed all the fun.

    I thought it was a really nice dinner, if you ask me.
    Alex called me later and asked me what happened. She said that half of the town was hysterical because of what happened at the Mayor’s house.
    I told her that I took her advice and that I was going to “Be myself so I could be more like Steve.” And it worked out great!
    All I heard on the other side of the phone was the sound, “Doh!”
    “Hey Zombie…” She said.
    “Yeah, Alex?” 
    “Never mind…” She said as she closed the phone.

    Wow, I’m finally starting to fit in around here.
    Sweet.

Monday
    I woke up this morning, and there was a bucket full of stuff next to my bed.
    On the side of the bucket was a big sign that said, “USE ME, PLEASE!!!”
    Inside the bucket was a bunch of stuff I had never seen before.
    There was a bottle of something called SHAM-POO. It said you’re supposed to put it on your hair.
    And I thought only Zombies put poo in their hair. Cool.
    There was a really big toothbrush in the bucket. It was so big, I thought the person who uses this thing must have teeth as big as my head.
    There was a sign on it that said it was something called a SCRUB-BRUSH.
    Then there was a tube of something called TOOF-PAYST, which said it goes with something called MOUF-WASH.
    There was also a bottle of something called LO-SHIN, that looked kinda creamy like Mushroom stew.
    And there was a big bar of SO-AP, which I’ve already seen before.

    Inside the bucket was instructions on how to use everything.
    I thought I would read the instructions while I got in the SHA-WUR, to save time.
    But then the paper melted!
    Man, what was I supposed to do with all this stuff now?
    I tried calling Alex, but for some reason the phone stopped working.
    I thought maybe I pressed the wrong button. But, it was hard to read the numbers with all that water spraying all over the place.

    I guess I have to figure it out by myself, I thought.
    So, I got out of the SHA-WUR, and grabbed the bottle of SHAM-POO.
    I poured the whole bottle on my head.
    I didn’t think it smelled like poo at all.
    But, I finally realized why it’s so much better to be a Zombie, and to not have eyes.

    Then I grabbed the brush and I put the TOOF-PAYST on it.
    But I had the hardest time trying to fit the brush in my mouth.
    I think this brush was made for somebody like Mutant, I thought.
    So I kept pushing until I finally got it in my mouth.
    I had a really hard time moving it around though.

    I grabbed the bottle of MOUF-WASH and used the whole thing.
    Good thing I had it too. I was really thirsty.

    The bottle of LO-SHIN said I needed to use it on my hands and my face.
    So I opened it up and poured it all over my face. Kind of felt like the vomit baths Mom used to give me when I was a kid. But it didn’t smell as good.

    I didn’t know what to do with the bucket, so I just put it on my head like I saw some other Zombies do back home.
    I was actually pretty proud of myself.
    And, I was really excited to show the villagers how good I looked.

    When I came downstairs, all the villagers dropped what they were doing.
    Then they started making that funny noise again.
    “HUURRRRRRR…HUURRRRRRR…”
    I wonder if that sound means that they’re really happy, I thought.
    Cool.
    I ran into Alex on my way to school, and she just looked at me…Confused.
    She took me by the hand and led me all the way to the back of the school.
    She took the bucket off of my head, and walked over to where there was a large hose.
    All of a sudden water came out of the hose and hit me right in the face.
    “HEEEEYYYYYY!!! Why’d you do that for?” I yelled as I stood there soaking wet.
    “Trust me. It was for your own good.” She said.
    After, she dried me with a bunch of paper towels.
    “Wow, you smell really nice.” She said.
    I didn’t think so…

Tuesday
    Today, I realized that if I didn’t want to get killed during the PVP Hunger Games Death Match Tournament, then I needed to get