Everything I Shouldn't / Everything I Need Read Online Free
Author: Stacey Mosteller
rubbing my back. This can't be happening to me. My parents? How did this become my life?
A hand touches my shoulder, and looking back, I see David's red-rimmed eyes that look so much like our father's and mine looking back at me. He's crouching on the floor in front of Jeremy and with a choked sob I launch myself at him. He tries to keep his balance, but falls to a sitting position with me in his lap when I wrap my arms around him and clutch him tight. His arms hold me close as he begins to rock side to side, murmuring how sorry he is to have to tell me but that he's going to take care of me. We sit on the floor, my brother and I, as we mourn the loss of our parents and life as we knew it.
"Hey Little Bit. You need to get up." Jeremy's voice is soft as he strokes my hair, brushing it away from my face as he speaks. For just a minute, I'm able to pretend that yesterday's events were just a dream, but reality intrudes quickly. If it wasn't real, Jeremy wouldn't be here right now waking me up. Turning my face into my pillows, I cry softly when I remember my parents are dead.
Keeping my covers in place, he gently scoots me over so that he can lie down beside me, placing his head on my pillow next to mine and turning my face so that we're face-to-face. "Shh SB, please don't cry. I can take a lot of things, but you crying isn't one of them." My smile is watery, but still there. I've missed David and Jeremy, and while the reason they're here sucks , I'm glad I'm not alone. Standing up, Jeremy holds out a hand to help me out of bed. I fell asleep in the clothes I wore to school yesterday which makes me feel dirty and self-conscious, but his gaze never moves from my face. "C'mon kid. Your grandparents will be here soon." Putting his hands on my shoulders, he turns me around before pushing me towards my bathroom. "Get a move on it lazy butt."
The fact that he's treating me like he always did makes me feel a little better. Soon, everyone would be treating me differently; I'd be the girl who lost her parents, the girl who had to deal with death. I'd read enough books to know what that was going to be like so him treating me like I was still normal helped make the whole ordeal a little less tragic, at least to my almost-sixteen-year-old self.
Once I'd taken the quickest shower known to teenage girls ever, I dressed in the only black clothes I could find. Black is for mourning right? So, I put on black skinny jeans with a black and grey striped long sleeve henley, and black sneakers. The only color I had is my wavy blonde hair, but I didn't do anything with it. I couldn't be bothered. I was nervous about how things were going to go when my grandparents get there. I vaguely remembered being in the room when David called them after picking me up from school and bringing me back to the house, but pretty much everything after the words "they're gone" was a blur.
Walking down the upstairs hall of our home, I avoid the pictures on the walls. If I look at the pictures of my parents, my brother and I, I'll lose it completely. I'm sure down the road they'll be comforting, but right now they're just a reminder of everything I've lost in the last 24 hours. When I get downstairs, Jeremy and David are nowhere to be found. The kitchen and den are both empty, but I can hear someone talking, it sounds like David, and it's coming from my dad's study.
I reach the door, but when I hear the anger in David's voice I hesitate. It might make me an evil person, but I don't know much about my brother's life back in Charlotte, so after looking around to make sure Jeremy's not close by, I lean close to listen to his conversation.
"Dammit Amy, I already told you I was sorry for not calling you yesterday. Forgive me for having to identify my parents' bodies, tell my baby sister that they were never coming home, break the news to my grandparents, and start the process of planning their fucking funeral!" By the end of his tirade David's yelling so I no longer
A hand touches my shoulder, and looking back, I see David's red-rimmed eyes that look so much like our father's and mine looking back at me. He's crouching on the floor in front of Jeremy and with a choked sob I launch myself at him. He tries to keep his balance, but falls to a sitting position with me in his lap when I wrap my arms around him and clutch him tight. His arms hold me close as he begins to rock side to side, murmuring how sorry he is to have to tell me but that he's going to take care of me. We sit on the floor, my brother and I, as we mourn the loss of our parents and life as we knew it.
"Hey Little Bit. You need to get up." Jeremy's voice is soft as he strokes my hair, brushing it away from my face as he speaks. For just a minute, I'm able to pretend that yesterday's events were just a dream, but reality intrudes quickly. If it wasn't real, Jeremy wouldn't be here right now waking me up. Turning my face into my pillows, I cry softly when I remember my parents are dead.
Keeping my covers in place, he gently scoots me over so that he can lie down beside me, placing his head on my pillow next to mine and turning my face so that we're face-to-face. "Shh SB, please don't cry. I can take a lot of things, but you crying isn't one of them." My smile is watery, but still there. I've missed David and Jeremy, and while the reason they're here sucks , I'm glad I'm not alone. Standing up, Jeremy holds out a hand to help me out of bed. I fell asleep in the clothes I wore to school yesterday which makes me feel dirty and self-conscious, but his gaze never moves from my face. "C'mon kid. Your grandparents will be here soon." Putting his hands on my shoulders, he turns me around before pushing me towards my bathroom. "Get a move on it lazy butt."
The fact that he's treating me like he always did makes me feel a little better. Soon, everyone would be treating me differently; I'd be the girl who lost her parents, the girl who had to deal with death. I'd read enough books to know what that was going to be like so him treating me like I was still normal helped make the whole ordeal a little less tragic, at least to my almost-sixteen-year-old self.
Once I'd taken the quickest shower known to teenage girls ever, I dressed in the only black clothes I could find. Black is for mourning right? So, I put on black skinny jeans with a black and grey striped long sleeve henley, and black sneakers. The only color I had is my wavy blonde hair, but I didn't do anything with it. I couldn't be bothered. I was nervous about how things were going to go when my grandparents get there. I vaguely remembered being in the room when David called them after picking me up from school and bringing me back to the house, but pretty much everything after the words "they're gone" was a blur.
Walking down the upstairs hall of our home, I avoid the pictures on the walls. If I look at the pictures of my parents, my brother and I, I'll lose it completely. I'm sure down the road they'll be comforting, but right now they're just a reminder of everything I've lost in the last 24 hours. When I get downstairs, Jeremy and David are nowhere to be found. The kitchen and den are both empty, but I can hear someone talking, it sounds like David, and it's coming from my dad's study.
I reach the door, but when I hear the anger in David's voice I hesitate. It might make me an evil person, but I don't know much about my brother's life back in Charlotte, so after looking around to make sure Jeremy's not close by, I lean close to listen to his conversation.
"Dammit Amy, I already told you I was sorry for not calling you yesterday. Forgive me for having to identify my parents' bodies, tell my baby sister that they were never coming home, break the news to my grandparents, and start the process of planning their fucking funeral!" By the end of his tirade David's yelling so I no longer
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