Everything I Shouldn't / Everything I Need Read Online Free Page A

have to press up against the door to hear everything he's saying word for word. There's a short pause while she responds, before he snaps back, "Goddammit, what would you have me do? Let someone else tell her for me? Would it have been better for me to let my grandparents do all of this? I don't know what the fuck you expect from me here."
    His voice is caustic, and it frightens me a little. I've never heard him speak to anyone this way, and who's Amy? Is she upset that he came to be with me? She must be his girlfriend. There are so many questions swirling around in my head right now, I can't even begin to make sense of it all. David's conversation turns even more heated, and I start to feel skeevy for listening in. I definitely don't want to go into my dad's office, I know I'll smell his cologne and that's just another thing I don't feel strong enough to handle. As I back away, I hear the front door close and Jeremy calls my name. David's voice cuts off abruptly and I know I need to get out of here before I'm caught. Walking as quickly and quietly as I can, I head for Jeremy's voice, which is moving closer to the kitchen now. Concentrating so much on the sound of my footsteps while listening for my brother behind me I don't notice Jeremy's in front of me until I run into him.
    "Oof." Jeremy's breath leaves him in a whoosh as he reaches out to steady me before I fall on my butt.
    Mortified, I stammer, "Sorry! Ohmigosh I'm so sorry!" Flushing all the way to the roots of my hair, I attempt to disentangle myself from him and end up falling on my rear end anyway. Before I can dwell on that , David walks into the kitchen with a "don't even ask" look on his face. Jeremy reaches down to pull me up as he gives him a questioning look, but my brother just shakes his head with a quick look at me. "Um, do y'all need me to leave so you can talk?" Obviously, he doesn't want to talk about whatever it is in front of me, and since I Can't exactly tell him I already heard at least part of what's going on, I'm acting like a brat.
    "Don't be stupid," David says, narrowing his eyes. "I just don't want to talk about it." Reaching into the bag Jeremy brought in, he takes out a biscuit and walks back towards dad's office.
    My eyes fill with tears at his dismissal. I already feel alone and now my brother's pushing me away too. With a sigh, Jeremy pulls me into his arms, "It'll be okay Sarah Beth, I promise."
    "It won't be okay. Nothing will ever be okay again, Jeremy!" Struggling to push him away, my voice keeps rising. "You and David won't be here forever. Once you leave, I'll be all alone. What's going to happen to me?" My voice breaks and I collapse against him weeping pitifully. I don't know how I even have any tears left to cry after the last 24 hours.
    Jeremy places a finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. He's so much taller than I am that I have to tip my head all the way back to meet his gaze. "You'll never be alone Little Bit. We'll always be here for you. Concentrate on getting through the next few days okay? Let David worry about the rest." I'm still clinging to him when the doorbell sounds; my grandparents are here to help us bury their children.

    The days leading up to my parents' funeral pass quickly and now it's time to make decisions about my future. David and both sets of my grandparents have been in dad's study for over an hour arguing about what to do with me. Jeremy's done everything he can think of to distract me, offering to take me to a movie, to drop me off at Livvie's house or bring her here to me, but nothing takes my mind off the fact that everyone is deciding what's going to happen to me - but me. I'm almost sixteen years old, why don't I get to have a say in any of this?
    When I ask Jeremy, he just shrugs and says, "Little Bit, let the adults figure it out. Don't worry your pretty little head about it."
    Seriously? It's like I'm back in the dark ages. I'm almost an adult, and I'm tired of not being heard.