Land Sakes Read Online Free Page A

side, and that hound, staring straight ahead, did not so much as look his way.
    I whispered to Barbara, “You sure them dogs are housebroke?”
    She giggled. “Maybe.”
    That didn’t help my jitters one bit.
    Percival was showing off the interior of the car, pressing his palm down on the soft leather seat. “Sir, the material that goes into this model is the kind dreams are made of. This leather, made of champagne-colored hides perfectly matched and hand-stitched, required the hides of eighteen cows.”
    Albert nodded and began admiring the instrument panel. Nozzle Nose fell all over himself explaining. “All the woodwork is Lombardian walnut, burled walnut with silver inlays.”
    â€œIt’s really a magnificent car.”
    I stood on one foot then the other, anxious to get this show on the road, but Percival wasn’t done. “Sir, this odometer is designed to record one million miles.”
    â€œSo I’ve heard,” Albert said. “I understand the Rolls has built-in security. Is that correct?”
    â€œThat is correct, sir.” And Nozzle Nose was off to the races. “The pin tumbler door locks are designed using an Egyptian model used four thousand years ago to seal the tombs of the pharaohs.” He paused for that to take effect. Albert nodded again, so Percival went on. “The odds for forging a key for these doors are one in twenty-four thousand. One in twenty-four thousand,” he repeated. “That is not all, sir; when I remove the key from the ignition, the transmission automatically locks.”
    I could tell that Albert was ready to leave, but Nozzle Nose kept right on talking. “This motorcar is equipped with a minibar, refrigerator, silver-plated cocktail flasks, crystal glasses, a vanity set, and a marvelous entertainment console.”
    â€œThank you,” Albert told him and threw up his handto me. “Esmeralda, enjoy yourself. Lenora sends her love. We’ll be praying for you.”
    â€œGood-bye, Albert. Take care of that vertigo.”
    I turned to say one last good-bye to the girls. There were tears in our eyes; we were too full to say much.
    Percival opened the door for me, and, sad as I was, I slid in beside Mrs. Winchester. Percival fastened my seat belt. I wiped my eyes. There was no turning back now.
    The mutt didn’t even notice me as I settled in my seat. Some guard dog .
    Barbara opened my door a bit and poked her head inside. “Mother, this is Miss Esmeralda. We call her Miss E. We all love her very much, and I know you will too.”
    â€œHow do you do,” Mrs. Winchester said in a small voice. “I am Winifred Win chus ter.”
    â€œI see,” I said. So this is the way it’s gonna be—Mrs . Win chus ter, my eye! Here’s somebody who won’t be calling her Mrs . Win chus ter. I am nobody’s lackey .
    Barbara tried to speak with her mother, but her mother had nothing to say to her. “Mother is shy,” Barbara explained. Then she pecked me on the cheek and closed the door.
    I’d never heard anything so crazy. Why would any mother be shy around her own daughter? Whatever this Mrs. Winifred Winchester was, she didn’t strike me as being shy. Dressed in an elegant linen suit with a chiffon scarf and a broad-brimmed hat with feathers, she had to be the queen of the world. It made me feel good to see that her outfit did not hide the fact that she was heavier than me. As for her face, I couldn’t see much of it because of that hat and the dark glasses, but what I could see put mein mind of a Cabbage Patch doll. What nose she had was pressed in between blubber cheeks. But I must say her perfume was nice. Must be Evening in Paris , I thought.
    The dog beside her was gazing off into the distance, still ignoring me. That was fine—I’d sooner it ignore me as growl, bark, bare its teeth, or bite a plug out of me.
    Percival had put on white gloves and was