God Hates You, Hate Him Back: Making Sense of The Bible Read Online Free

that business about getting food and building shelter that we would to get reacquainted with. We would want to relearn how to use and repair many of our machines. Learning to understand spoken and written language would also be a top priority, given that these skills are necessary for acquiring most others. When in this process of reclaiming our humanity will it be important to know that Jesus was born of a virgin? Or that he was resurrected? And how would we relearn these truths, if they are indeed true? By reading the Bible? Our tour of the shelves will deliver similar pearls from antiquity – like the ‘fact’ that Isis, the goddess of fertility, sports an impressive pair of cow horns. Reading further, we will learn that Thor carries a hammer and that Marduk’s sacred animals are horses, dogs and a dragon with a forked tongue……and when we will want to relearn that premarital sex is a sin? Or that adulteresses should be stoned to death?”
     
    Harris further contends that if the above all-humanity memory loss were to occur, then our relearning of all things of relevance would place the Bible and Qur’an on the shelf next to Ovid’s ‘Metamorphoses’ and the ‘Egyptian Book of the Dead’.
     
    Alright, enough with the Theology 101 lesson, let’s have some fun in exploring the ancient Biblical world of murder, barbarism, bestiality, rape and plunder.
     
    PS: God doesn’t know you are reading this book, so don’t be scared.
     

The Books of The Pentateuch
     

Chapter One - The Book of Genesis
     
    “ Do you think that, if you were granted omnipotence and omniscience and millions of years in which to perfect your world, you could produce nothing better than the Ku Klux Klan or the Fascists?”
     
    Bertand Russell (London, 1927)
     
    Genesis is the first book of the Bible of Judaism and Christianity, and the first of five books of the Pentateuch or Torah. It recounts Judeo-Christian beliefs regarding the world, from creation to the descent of the children of Israel into Egypt, and contains some of the best-known stories of the Old Testament, including Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, Noah’s Ark, the Tower of Babel and the biblical Patriarchs.
     
    For Jews the theological importance of Genesis centers on the covenants linking God to his Chosen People and the people to the Promised Land. Christianity has reinterpreted Genesis as the prefiguration of Christian beliefs, notably the Christian view of Christ as the new Adam and the New Testament as the culmination of the covenants.
     
The Creation
     
    The very first sentence of Genesis and therefore the Bible states:
     
    “ In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” (Genesis 1:1 NIV)
     
    That’s it! Doesn’t tell us how he made it; what building materials were used; if any of the work was outsourced to India; or from where he sourced the materials. The Bible’s explanation of the creation of the universe is paramount to the smart-ass kid in the classroom telling you, “It just is and you wouldn’t understand it even if I told you anyway!” Imagine how confusing the creation of the universe by the Hebrew God 6,000 years ago must have been to the Sumerians as they watched on from their huts drinking beer, and using glue. Wait. What?
     
    The next time someone says there is still a debate between our modern cosmological understanding of the universe versus the Biblical creation, know that on one hand we have a library full of hundreds of years of scientific research cataloguing our galaxy, the relationship between stars and planets; and the wondrous beauty of evolutionary development, and on the other hand, that being the Bible, the good book has compressed all that natural world wonderment into a single pithy sentence. Magic! Scientists are the first to admit that there are still some missing links in understanding the finer details as to the creation of the universe, but any ‘gap’ that we currently have today is not logically resolved