him see that-- not this time.
I headed for the front door of the restaurant. Matt didn’t follow me out. He didn’t try to chase me then, but I knew he would be at my apartment later. He’d be full of apologies, and full of reasons that I should forgive him. And, like an idiot, I would fall for it. I always did.
I stood in front of the restaurant for a minute, a steady stream of tears flowing down my cheeks. I heard the door to the restaurant open and close, and footsteps behind me. I froze.
“Charley?”
I exhaled. The voice belonged to Sara. I turned to face her, making no effort to hide the tears. “How long has he been cheating on me?” I cried.
She walked closer to me and held her arms out. My lip quivered, and I took a deep breath before collapsing into Sara’s arms and sobbing. In a short time, I achieved the type of sob a petulant toddler reaches after a massive tantrum. This left me sniffling uncontrollably at random intervals. After a minute or two of this, I pulled back and looked up at her. “I need to get out of here,” my voice still sounded as if I were crying.
Sara looked at me, and I felt even worse. Her eyes were full of pity. I had hoped to avoid this look. It was why I had rushed out so quickly, and yet, here I was; and Sara was looking down at me with a look that said, “Poor, Poor Charley”. I hated that look, but if it had to come from someone, I could handle it most from Sara.
“Let’s go,” she said sternly, placing one arm around me as we walked toward her car. On the way to hers, I noticed what had been responsible for her initial mood change. Matt’s car was parked just a few spots away from Sara’s. His was easy to recognize because of all of the personalization he’d done. His shiny, too large wheels were always what let me know I was looking at his car. I peered down at the chrome wheels, remembering the day he’d bought them. He’d been two hours late to my birthday dinner because he had been driving around showing off the new, thousand dollar wheels to all of his friends.
If I had been paying attention back then, those wheels could have been my warning to keep away from a guy like Matt. If I’d been paying attention tonight, they could have warned me that I was about to get my heart stomped on.
“Stupid wheels,” I muttered.
Sara gave me a slight push, encouraging me to move forward and toward her car.
As we walked, I watched as the street lights cast our shadows onto the pavement. Sara’s was long and fluid, just like her real body. In the shadows, our height difference seemed so small. I stood there watching our pavement twins, wishing I could trade places with mine. Beautiful, and graceful, sprawled across the parking lot—free from the agony of being flesh and blood.
Sara’s Honda beeped loudly in response to her key FOB, and it startled me out of my revelry. She gestured for me to get in before she slid into the driver's side seat and started the car. Once I was settled inside and the seat warmers had kicked in, I realized how cold I had been while standing outside.
Sara pulled the car onto the street and headed toward my apartment. Before I could react, she started in. “Okay,” she breathed, and began rapidly, “My brother is an idiot. I had no idea. I swear! I mean, I saw his car, and that’s why I was distracted. I honestly thought maybe he just loaned it to a friend or something. I was not expecting to see him there with that…that skank! If I’d known sooner, I would have done something. I would said something… ”
“I know, Sara,” I cut her off. “It’s OK.” It wasn’t, but it also wasn’t her fault. I wasn’t about to take it out on her.
“I don’t really know if I should go home,” I told her. I hated to idea of staying anywhere other than my own place, but I also hated the idea of dealing with Matt tonight.
“Do you want to stay at my place?” she offered.
“I don’t know,” I told her. “Let me think about