Waking Charley Vaughan Read Online Free

he grabbed my arm. I tried to pull it away but he was stronger than I was. I couldn’t break free.
    Matt-- a tall, sturdy man with a handsome face-- just stood there with his deep blue eyes locking onto mine. They were almost pleading, but more than anything, they were embarrassed.
    “Did you sleep with her?” I tried to make my voice sound stronger—somehow fierce, but instead, it gave away every bit of weakness and shock I was feeling at that moment.
    As I waited for him to answer me, I remember thinking about how ugly he looked. The man whose beautiful blue eyes and bright, dimpled smile had once made it difficult for me to even form words in his presence, looked so weak—so pathetic—that it was hard to even remember how it used to feel to look at him. The drunken butterflies that had once danced in my stomach had been hit with a paralyzing sobriety. I stood there, staring at him, waiting to hear something—anything that could change the way I felt.
    “I messed up” is what he finally said. His tone was sadly earnest. “I messed up so big, and I am so sorry.” I could see the sheen of tears filling his eyes.
    I glared at him, my vision going red. I hadn’t needed him to answer my question, but when he did, fury, pain, and what felt like raw heat surged through my body.
    “You’re damn right you messed up,” I sputtered, not even loud enough for him to hear me. I wanted to scream the words at him until my voice gave out, but I didn’t have the energy. I wish it had been some internal strength—some sense of being the bigger, better person that stopped me from screaming at him right there in front of a restaurant full of people, but it wasn’t. It was the shock of it all that stopped me from making a scene. More than that, it was the crippling fear eating away inside of me. The voice in my head, telling me that this was my fault: my mother’s voice. I didn’t know how to respond, so I said nothing.
    “Babe,” he cleared his throat. I could see this was hard for him. It was difficult to have to address such an embarrassing issue in front of so many people. Image was everything to Matt Anderson, and I knew he was trying to figure out how to spin this so he could look better. Normally, I would help him. I was always good for offering a defense to something mean he’d said, or some important thing of mine he’d forgotten. I couldn’t bring myself to defend him then.
    Let him suffer, I thought bitterly.
    “Babe, I am so sorry. You have to let me explain. This wasn’t how you deserved to find out. I never wanted it to be like this. I didn’t want it to even happen in the first place.” With that, Kelly’s face took on an indignant expression. He had hurt her feelings. She didn’t seem to care that she had slept with my fiancé, but she was hurt that he hadn’t stood by her or said he was glad he had done it.
    “I don’t have to let you do anything,” my voice was colder, but still weak. My eyes bore into his. “I hope she was worth it,” I said softly. “I hope she was worth losing someone who loved you.”
    “You’re angry, okay. I get that. But don’t be so dramatic.” He kept looking around at the other patrons. We were very much making a scene, and I could tell he was uncomfortable. “Don’t start using love in the past tense. You can’t just throw everything away within minutes of finding out. You need to think about it. You’ll change your mind. You can forgive me. ” There was a note of hope in that last part, almost as if he was asking. I stared at him, making a conscious effort to keep my face blank.
    “Charley,” he said in a low, sing-song tone as he stepped closer to me. He took my hand into his, but I pulled it away fiercely, placing my hand on my scarf instead. 
    The room was silent as I stepped back from him once more. Despite my efforts, my eyes were so full of tears that everything in front of me was a blur. One blink and the dam would be broken. I wouldn’t let