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me by placing his hands on either side of me on the rail. The muscles on his upper arms bulge, straining his shirt.
    “See that redhead?” I say, pointing, trying to sound in control, sounding scared instead. “See that guy next to him? That’s my brother. My very protective brother. I’m going to call him if you don’t leave me alone.” His head turns briefly to the crowd and back. He waits a beat, and then his smile and eyes go cold.
    “OK, OK,” he says, pushing off the rail. “Your loss.” He runs stubby fingers down my cheek and neck before walking away without a backward glance. The feel of his fingers on my skin lingers, as unpleasant as snail tracks.
    What is wrong with these people? At this point, everything has a surreal quality. I’m so exhausted and emotionally used up that I can barely stand. As if he can read my mind, one vendor I’ve been watching looks straight up at me and gives me a huge smile. He looks exactly like a wolf.
    That’s it. I can’t take any more. I head straight for the front of the hotel where cabs are lined up waiting for fares, launch myself into the first available one, and head back to the motel. In the room, I lock the door, drag the table and chairs in front of it, throw off my clothes and crawl into bed.
    Once there, I come undone. The tears won’t stop. I know I have to be tough. Someone is after me and soon may find me. I can’t stop looking over my shoulder and I can’t afford to fall apart. The time for hiding in the corner is over. But right now I feel so alone and scared. Alone and scared and lost.

 
    Chapter 4
     
     
    It’s difficult not to kill him immediately. He annoys me so. On the other hand, it amuses me to prolong the agony of this cretin. I can almost taste his fear. Sweat pours down his ugly, pockmarked face and he keeps shifting from one foot to the other as if he has to take a whiz in the worst way.
    “Go over it all again, especially the part where you lost her.” My last three words have an edge and he’s cowering and shaking as if I’ve struck him.
    “God, I don’t know. We’re in the raft. Class Four rapids. A little calmer this time of year, but still…I wait until the perfect time, then whack her dad over the head and dump him over the side. I thought I caved in his skull, I hit him so hard. I was going to do the same with her, but she had already jumped in after her dad. I go in after the both of them. Her dad’s coming around so I have my hands full. He’s a fighter; it takes a while. By that time, she’s gone.” He licks his cracked lips and actually grabs his crotch as if he can’t wait any longer.
    “What do you mean ‘gone’?” My fingers clutch my temples to soothe the blood vessels pulsing there.
    “I look up after doing her dad and she’s nowhere to be seen.” The poor fool can’t take his eyes off my fingers as they move to stroke the katana sword on my desk.
    “And then?”
    His voice is higher when he starts talking again. “I get to the bank of the river. I’m looking all over the place. She’s gone. So I search both sides of the river. It takes a while because I’ve got to cross where it’s calmer. No trace of her. I finally go back to their cabin. There are wet tracks in the cabin and garage. Car’s gone.” He looks at me hopefully, like a dog wanting a treat for rolling over. I’m so disgusted; my fingers twitch on the sword as I imagine the pleasure of lopping his fool head off.
    “What about their boat?”
    “What, you mean the raft?”
    “No, I mean their boat, you idiot! While you were wasting your time in an impossible search on the shoreline, you could have just waited for her by their boat. She had to take their family boat the three miles from the raft launch point back to their cabin. It’s the way they got there and the fastest way back to the cabin. Or, you could have gone straight to their cabin to wait for her. By searching, you gave her time to get away.” The sharp pain in my