Ubu Plays, The Read Online Free Page A
Author: Alfred Jarry
Help, help!
THE QUEEN. Now Boleslas is dead! Struck by a fatal bullet.
BOGGERLAS. Ho there! (LADISLAS turns round.) Defend yourself. Bravo, Ladislas !
THE QUEEN. Oh! he’s surrounded.
BOGGERLAS. He’s done for. M’Nure has just split him in two like a sausage.
THE QUEEN. Help, help! Those maniacs have forced their way into the palace. They’re coming up the stairs.
The din grows louder.
BOGGERLAS. Oh, that vile Ubu, wretch, rascal, I’d just like to get hold of him ...
SCENE FOUR
The same. The door is broken in. PA UBU enters, followed by his mob of LUNATICS.
PA UBU. Oh, you would, would you, Boggerlas ? And what, pray, would you do to me ?
BOGGERLAS. By God’s will, I shall defend my mother to the death. The first man to take a step forward is as good as dead.
PA UBU. M’Nure, I’m scared. Get me out of here.
A SOLDIER (advances). Boggerlas, surrender.
BOGGERLAS. Here’s one for you, you dog! (He splits his skull).
THE QUEEN. That’s the spirit, Boggerlas, keep it up!
SEVERAL ( advancing ) . Boggerlas, we promise to save your life.
BOGGERLAS. Blackguards, wine-bladders, mercenary scum.
He flourishes his sword and massacres the lot of them.
PA UBU. Bother ! But I’ll still win in the end.
BOGGERLAS. Mother, escape by the secret staircase.
THE QUEEN. And you, my son, what about you?
BOGGERLAS. I’ll follow you.
PA UBU. Quick. Capture the Queen. Drat, she’s got away. As for you, you little worm ! ... (He advances on BOGGERLAS.)
BOGGERLAS. Ah! by God’s will, here’s my vengeance!
He rips open PA UBU’ s boodle with a terrible sword-thrust. Mother, I follow you!
He disappears by the secret staircase.
SCENE FIVE
A cavern in the mountains.
BOGGERLAS enters, followed by QUEEN ROSAMUND.
BOGGERLAS. Here we shall be safe.
THE QUEEN. Oh, I do hope so. Boggerlas, support me!
She falls on the snow.
BOGGERLAS. What ails you, mother dear?
THE QUEEN. I am sick unto death, Boggerlas, and fear I have only a few hours to live.
BOGGERLAS. What! have you caught a chill?
THE QUEEN. How do you think I can stand up to so many misfortunes ? The King murdered, our family destroyed, and you, a scion of the noblest race that ever carried a sword, forced to flee to the mountains like a common smuggler ?
BOGGERLAS. And by whom, great God, by whom? A vulgar wretch like Ubu, a common little adventurer, a mister nobody from nowhere, fat toad, stinking tramp! And when I think that my father decorated him and made him a count, and the very next day that villain shamelessly laid violent hands on him.
THE QUEEN. O Boggerlas! When I think how happy we all were before that wicked Old Ubu arrived on the scene. But now, alas, everything is changed.
BOGGERLAS. What can we do, but wait in hope and never renounce our rights ?
THE QUEEN. I long for your just restitution, my dear child, but I fear that I myself shall never see that happy day.
BOGGERLAS. Here, what’s come over you? She grows pale, she swoons ! Help, help ! But we are alone in the wilderness ! My God, her heart has stopped beating. She is dead. Can it be possible ? Yet another victim of the fiendish Ubu! I
He buries his face in his hands and weeps.
Ah God, how tragic to find oneself all alone at the age of fourteen with a terrible vengeance to pursue!
He falls prey to the most violent despair.
Meanwhile, the SOULS of WENCESLAS, BOLESLAS, LADISLAS and ROSAMUND enter the cavern. The oldest of them approaches
BOGGERLAS and rouses him gently from his stupor.
BOGGERLAS. Ah ! What do I see? My whole family, my ancestors ... What miracle is this ?
THE SHADE. Learn, Boggerlas, that during my lifetime I was Lord Mathias of Königsberg, the first king - and founder - of our House. I leave our vengeance in your hands. (He presents him with an enormous sword.) And may this sword which I present to you know no rest until it shall have dealt death to the usurper.
All vanish, and
THE QUEEN. Now Boleslas is dead! Struck by a fatal bullet.
BOGGERLAS. Ho there! (LADISLAS turns round.) Defend yourself. Bravo, Ladislas !
THE QUEEN. Oh! he’s surrounded.
BOGGERLAS. He’s done for. M’Nure has just split him in two like a sausage.
THE QUEEN. Help, help! Those maniacs have forced their way into the palace. They’re coming up the stairs.
The din grows louder.
BOGGERLAS. Oh, that vile Ubu, wretch, rascal, I’d just like to get hold of him ...
SCENE FOUR
The same. The door is broken in. PA UBU enters, followed by his mob of LUNATICS.
PA UBU. Oh, you would, would you, Boggerlas ? And what, pray, would you do to me ?
BOGGERLAS. By God’s will, I shall defend my mother to the death. The first man to take a step forward is as good as dead.
PA UBU. M’Nure, I’m scared. Get me out of here.
A SOLDIER (advances). Boggerlas, surrender.
BOGGERLAS. Here’s one for you, you dog! (He splits his skull).
THE QUEEN. That’s the spirit, Boggerlas, keep it up!
SEVERAL ( advancing ) . Boggerlas, we promise to save your life.
BOGGERLAS. Blackguards, wine-bladders, mercenary scum.
He flourishes his sword and massacres the lot of them.
PA UBU. Bother ! But I’ll still win in the end.
BOGGERLAS. Mother, escape by the secret staircase.
THE QUEEN. And you, my son, what about you?
BOGGERLAS. I’ll follow you.
PA UBU. Quick. Capture the Queen. Drat, she’s got away. As for you, you little worm ! ... (He advances on BOGGERLAS.)
BOGGERLAS. Ah! by God’s will, here’s my vengeance!
He rips open PA UBU’ s boodle with a terrible sword-thrust. Mother, I follow you!
He disappears by the secret staircase.
SCENE FIVE
A cavern in the mountains.
BOGGERLAS enters, followed by QUEEN ROSAMUND.
BOGGERLAS. Here we shall be safe.
THE QUEEN. Oh, I do hope so. Boggerlas, support me!
She falls on the snow.
BOGGERLAS. What ails you, mother dear?
THE QUEEN. I am sick unto death, Boggerlas, and fear I have only a few hours to live.
BOGGERLAS. What! have you caught a chill?
THE QUEEN. How do you think I can stand up to so many misfortunes ? The King murdered, our family destroyed, and you, a scion of the noblest race that ever carried a sword, forced to flee to the mountains like a common smuggler ?
BOGGERLAS. And by whom, great God, by whom? A vulgar wretch like Ubu, a common little adventurer, a mister nobody from nowhere, fat toad, stinking tramp! And when I think that my father decorated him and made him a count, and the very next day that villain shamelessly laid violent hands on him.
THE QUEEN. O Boggerlas! When I think how happy we all were before that wicked Old Ubu arrived on the scene. But now, alas, everything is changed.
BOGGERLAS. What can we do, but wait in hope and never renounce our rights ?
THE QUEEN. I long for your just restitution, my dear child, but I fear that I myself shall never see that happy day.
BOGGERLAS. Here, what’s come over you? She grows pale, she swoons ! Help, help ! But we are alone in the wilderness ! My God, her heart has stopped beating. She is dead. Can it be possible ? Yet another victim of the fiendish Ubu! I
He buries his face in his hands and weeps.
Ah God, how tragic to find oneself all alone at the age of fourteen with a terrible vengeance to pursue!
He falls prey to the most violent despair.
Meanwhile, the SOULS of WENCESLAS, BOLESLAS, LADISLAS and ROSAMUND enter the cavern. The oldest of them approaches
BOGGERLAS and rouses him gently from his stupor.
BOGGERLAS. Ah ! What do I see? My whole family, my ancestors ... What miracle is this ?
THE SHADE. Learn, Boggerlas, that during my lifetime I was Lord Mathias of Königsberg, the first king - and founder - of our House. I leave our vengeance in your hands. (He presents him with an enormous sword.) And may this sword which I present to you know no rest until it shall have dealt death to the usurper.
All vanish, and
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