necessary.â I feel guilty about all the time heâs wasted on me, a complete stranger. Itâs time to let him off the hook.
He stares back at the house for a second. âAre you sure?â
âYeah.â I try to sound convincing. âYouâve gone above and beyond.â
âWell ⦠I did spend a few years in the Boy Scouts.â
âAnd itâs obviously paid off.â I force myself to smile, to reassure him.
The car door is now dripping wet. I finish getting out, hook my bag over my shoulder, and walk around to the driverâs side window.
âThanks for everything, Liam,â I say.
âLike I said, no big whoop. And drop by the coffee shop sometime. Iâm there most nights.â
âOkay. Maybe.â I step back from the curb and wave.
He sticks his head out. âIâm going to wait here until youâre in.â
I nod and make my way up the walk. When I get to the front step I turn and look back. I realize the upset feeling in my stomach isnât completely about seeing Aidan again; a bit of it is about saying goodbye to Liam. Liam, who only knows me as Lyssa â anonymous Lyssa. In spite of all the crap that came earlier, this past hour has been my first taste of normal in a long time. And it was ⦠nice. Then again, I guess it depends on your definition of normal.
The lights are on inside the house, but the porch is in complete darkness. I go to ring the bell, but the door swings open before my finger makes contact.
There he stands, the brightness from inside the house making him look like heâs glowing around the edges, like heâs not real, like heâs an angel. Or a ghost. My breath catches, blocking my words. I didnât expect to feel this way.
I hear Liam toot his horn and drive off.
Aidan looks past me over my shoulder and frowns. âI could have picked you up, you know.â
My words are still blocked.
He glances up at the porch ceiling. âSorry, the bulbâs burnt out. Come in. Here, let me take that.â He holds a hand out for my bag.
Wordlessly, I pass it to him and step into the hall.
For a long moment we study each other. I take in every tiny detail. The changes are subtle. His dark eyes are the same, but set in a face that looks older. His brown hair is slightly shorter, not so long and âShaggy from Scooby-Doo â anymore. Heâs still tall, but he looks even taller because heâs lost weight. I wonder what he thinks about me. Do I look the same as I did two years ago? Then I remember ⦠he was at the funeral. He would have seen me this morning.
Aidan moves first. He sets my duffle bag down, circles his arms around me, and envelops my body with his. All I want to do is hug him back, but Iâm hurt. Hurt about this morning, hurt about the last two years. My body remains completely rigid. Iâm a cardboard cut-out.
He gets the message and lets go. I back away from him. I donât know what to do with myself, where to look, what to say. Using my front tooth, I scrape at a dry flake of skin on my lip until I taste blood.
He nosily clears his throat. âIâm sorry about your mom, Lyssa.â
Finally I speak. âPeople said you were there this morning.â
âYeah.â He nods.
âWhy didnât you come and talk to me?â
He drops his eyes. âI didnât know if youâd want me to.â
A few seconds go by. âWhat about Vince? Did you talk to him?â
His head jerks up. He looks insulted. âNo.â
âThen why did you come?â
He drops his eyes again. âShe was always good to me, your mom. I know I didnât make it easy.â
Thatâs an understatement. Aidan was the poster boy for âtroubled teen.â I knew he smoked drugs; I could always smell it on his clothes. Iâm sure Mom could smell it too, but she ignored it, probably to keep the peace. I figure Vince was more an expert in âeau