in?” Cassie asks as she saunters up the stairs.
“Yeah,” Gavin says. He grabs my arm. “Where you goin’?’”
“To my place to grab a few things.”
“But breakfast-”
“I’ll swing by. I have to watch you enjoy the beer I won’t be drinking, right?”
His eyes go all squinty the way they do when he’s examining me, searching for a deeper reason than what my words are offering. If there’s anyone who can see past my thick walls, it’s him. I look away, focusing on the dark, drying blood coating my arm.
“Right,” he says hesitantly, still staring, still gripping my arm. “And your Witch?”
I peer over my shoulder at her. She tucks a strand of fallen hair behind her ear, and then rubs her hands together, preparing for the last memory-wiping spell. “She’s good. She came in her car.”
Cassie snorts under her breath and offers a lifted brow toward Gavin. He shakes his head. He never agrees with me when it comes to Jezi. “Whatever you say, man. We’ll talk about it over breakfast.”
I snatch my arm from him, ignoring the eyes the Witches have set on me, judging me. “I don’t want to talk about it over breakfast. I don’t want to talk about it at all.” Without another word, I rush down the rest of the stairs, anxious to get to my car. I can’t take another minute inside the house, another minute inside my head. The sooner I can shower off this blood, the sooner I’ll feel normal again.
THE LOFT I STAY I N is a small hole in the wall I got from one of Mack’s friends who only bought it to rent out. Barren gray walls, crumbling brick around the window, rutted wooden floors…it’s where I call home, and it’s nestled in the lower Manhattan on Ludlow, sitting right above a Chinese restaurant.
The sector Jezi and I are responsible for protecting extends a little past the Upper West Side. When we were fresh out of the Academy, it was barely a few blocks past my place. It seems the more paranormal we capture or take down, the further our reach extends; the more Mack wants from us.
After showering the evidence of the hunt away, I step out of my bathroom with a towel wrapped loosely around my waist. Standing in front of my closet, I know I can wear whatever I feel like wearing. I’m off duty, but I like the way I feel inside the Night Watchmen uniform. I like the simplicity of my black t-shirt and black denim jeans. I like sporting the Coven’s symbol, a pentagram surrounded by three half-moons, on the shoulder of my leather jacket.
It’s what defines me.
The phone on my nightstand goes off. I huff and run my fingers through my wet hair. Can’t I have just a moment to myself? Can’t I just be left alone, the way I prefer it?
No. I can’t. I can’t because I’m bound by oath to the Coven. I’m bound to my partner. I’m bound to my brother.
Two full, flustered steps and I swipe the phone up. It’s Gavin. With a small sigh, I answer, “I told you, I’m coming. I just got out of the shower.”
“Forget that. Breakfast is over. I’m coming to you.”
“For what?”
“To talk,” he says seriously, bearing the tone of my father.
“Gavin, I already told you-”
“Tough shit.”
The phone clicks off. Great. He still won’t let go of the fact that I don’t care for Jezi in that way. At least once a month he tries to have the same conversation with me. I don’t know if it’s his own guilt for loving Cassie, knowing that she’ll die because of it, or if it’s Cassie in his ear telling him what he should do for the sake of Jezi who is her friend.
I’d put money on it that it’s the latter.
Either way, I don’t see Jezi like that. I never have, and I’m pretty sure I never will. My brother doesn’t understand that love can’t be defined by pointless words in a meaningless conversation; it’s ineffable. It’s a spiritual feeling, an irresistible desire to want someone in all the ways that makes us whole.
Or so I’ve read.
And if I’m