The Fabled Fifth Graders of Aesop Elementary School Read Online Free Page A

seat,” she said. “Mrs. Struggles will be with you in a few minutes.”
    “Have I done something wrong?” Bernadette asked.
    Mrs. Shorthand eyed her as if she were a criminal. “Sit,” she said. She turned away to answer the phone.
    Bernadette settled into the chair, then opened her notebook. She reread her report about Mrs. Bozzetto.
    Mrs. Shorthand whispered something into the phone’s receiver.
    Bernadette looked up from her notebook.
    Stop the presses!
    Had she just heard Mrs. Shorthand say the two most terrifying words that could ever be uttered in a school … 
head lice
?
    Bernadette’s investigative heart leaped with joy.
    Head lice were an even bigger scoop than crazy cat ladies!
    Turning to a clean page in her notebook, she started writing.
    But she’d only scrawled a few sentences when Mrs. Struggles opened her office door. She crooked her finger at Bernadette. “You and I need to have a little chat about cheese and truth, young lady.”
    Bernadette gulped and closed her notebook. Her report would have to wait until
after
detention.
       The following Monday, the fifth graders were on the air again.
    Melvin gave the announcements.
    Ham read the menu.
    Jackie reported on sports.
    And Stanford droned on.
    Then the camera panned to Bernadette. (Both the beauty and the joke segments had been canceled due to what Miss Turner called “the violent content of last week’s reports.”)
    “Students of Aesop Elementary,” said Bernadette gravely. “Last week, while in the office, I uncovered a disturbing revelation.” She adjusted her horn-rimmed glasses, letting the suspense build, then said, “Our school is in the throes of a medical catastrophe—an outbreak of head lice.” She paused, then concluded, “This reporter, for one, is grossed out. Aren’t you?”
    “Is it true?” gasped Missy as soon as the camera’s Off light blinked red. “Is the school full of head lice?”
    Bernadette shrugged. “Well, I think I overheard Mrs. Shorthand say it.”
    “You
think
?” repeated Humphrey.
    “That’s hearsay,” said Amisha. “I know because my dad’s an attorney.”
    “Whatever,” replied Bernadette. She tucked her horn-rimmed glasses back into her pocket and headed to class.
    That afternoon when the final bell rang, Mr.Jupiter asked Bernadette to stay after school. “I want to talk to you about today’s investigative report,” he said.
    “Hard-hitting, wasn’t it?” bragged Bernadette.
    “It certainly was,” agreed Mr. Jupiter. “All afternoon, parents have flooded the office with calls demanding that action be taken. We’ve had exterminators in the basement, health inspectors in the lunchroom, and barbers calling in to offer their services.”
    Bernadette shrugged. “I report what I hear.”
    “And did you clearly hear Mrs. Shorthand say ‘head lice’?”
    Bernadette squirmed for a moment. “Maybe not
crystal
clearly,” she finally admitted. “But I
think
that’s what I heard her say.”
    Mr. Jupiter nodded. “Well, here are the facts as I know them. The school is implementing a new parking safety procedure. One suggestion was for teachers to drive off the lot with their
headlights
on.”
    “Oh,” said Bernadette. “Oh … oh, no, I guess I’ll be back in the principal’s office tomorrow morning.”
    Mr. Jupiter patted her shoulder. “You know, when I worked as a cub reporter for the
Klondike Courier
, myeditor was always shouting ‘Dagnabbit it, Jupiter, verify your sources.’”
    “I don’t understand,” said Bernadette.
    “All good reporters verify their stories,” explained Mr. Jupiter. “They don’t just make things up based on hearsay and rumor. They interview people, double-check their facts, see for themselves. Do you understand?”
    “I think so,” said Bernadette.
    “Good,” said Mr. Jupiter with a smile. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”
    Bernadette stuffed her notebook into her backpack and headed out to the bike ramp. But instead of