The Cat Who Wasn't a Dog Read Online Free

a generous dollop – and proceeded to drink it herself.
    The black bundle began to flail about frantically. Dame Cecile had known Evangeline longer than any of us. She had no illusions as to what was happening.
    â€˜Here – ’ Since Eddie obviously felt that he was far
too involved already, I gave up. I decanted Cho-Cho-San into his arms and stepped forward to disentangle the Dame.
    It wasn’t easy. All that thrashing around had twisted the material tightly around her. There was also the very real danger of a black eye if I got too close to those thrashing limbs. I tugged tentatively at a loose bulge in the cloak, but stepped back hastily as a wildly flailing fist appeared from beneath it and just missed me.
    Evangeline had been watching critically. Now she drained her glass, set it down on the coffee table and took centre stage.
    â€˜You’ll never get anywhere that way,’ she said. ‘You need to treat it like one of the old adhesive bandages. A quick sharp pull and – ’
    She caught up a loose end of the cloak and gave it a sudden upward yank and twist. Dame Cecile went spiralling off the sofa to land all of a heap on the floor.
    My dears, the language! Poor Eddie cringed – although he could dish it out, he couldn’t take it, especially from a woman. If he hadn’t been holding Cho-Cho-San, I believe he would have put his hands over his ears. If he’d had enough hands he’d have covered Cho-Cho-San’s ears, too. She was far too young and innocent to listen to that sort of thing.
    â€˜That’s the way to do it!’ Evangeline regarded Dame Cecile with satisfaction. ‘Up you get, Cecile, and play hostess. In case you haven’t noticed, you have guests. Start pouring the drinks.’
    â€˜I will never forgive you!’ Dame Cecile choked. ‘Never!’
    Only Eddie looked worried. I retrieved Cho-Cho-San and sat down.
    â€˜Fix your hair, Cecile,’ Evangeline said. ‘As it is, you could step straight onstage as The Madwoman of Chaillot right now.’
    â€˜Never! Do you hear me? Never!’ Dame Cecile struggled to her feet, glaring at Evangeline. ‘And you can forget any
idea of replacing me in Arsenic and Old Lace. I shall go on with the show myself!’
    Thank heaven for that. I exhaled a silent sigh of relief. Although I thought I had Evangeline fairly well convinced that she shouldn’t take on the role, it was a relief to know that it was no longer available.
    â€˜Mine’s a brandy,’ Evangeline said. ‘Trixie? Eddie? Cecile is waiting.’
    â€˜Brandy is fine with me.’ I was abruptly aware that I could use something bracing.
    Eddie nodded agreement weakly. The adrenalin rush had faded and the aftermath was beginning to affect us all. I don‘t know if Eddie felt as limp as I did, but his face was pale and he was shuddering sporadically.
    I leaned back and closed my eyes, but a vision of exploding flames shot up behind them and I opened them again. Cho-Cho-San looked up at me meaningfully, then began licking at her ash-spattered front.
    She was right, she was a mess; we were all a mess. Flecks of soot had smudged every face and settled on our clothing. Even as I watched, a large flake drifted off from Evangeline’s sleeve and settled on the white carpet. I noted in passing that she appeared to have a double set of eyebrows and Eddie’s streaks around the ears would have passed for muttonchop whiskers from a seat in the stalls. I didn‘t want to think what my own face must look like. It was time I got to a mirror – and a wash basin.
    Even Dame Cecile had not escaped. The cloak had obviously trapped a cloud of cinders as Eddie had whirled it over her and I decided I’d rather not be around when she discovered the tiny singed holes dotting her silk gown.
    â€˜I think I could do with a little freshening-up.’ I lowered Cho-Cho-San to the floor and stood up carefully,