Tameless Read Online Free

child.
    “Right.” He nodded, and I could see him processing all of this. As surprised as I was to see him, it was becoming clear that he was more surprised than I was.
    I decided to take the initiative and step across the tiles, right up to Wes, and I put my arms out. He bent down slightly—not as much as he used to the few times we hugged back then. As we embraced each other, I smelled the leather of his jacket and some kind of mild cologne.
    “So, how are things?” I asked, after he released me.
    He touched his fingers to his chin, a nervous action I’d never seen Wes do before. “A lot better than the last time you saw me.” Nervous laugh.
    All I could do was smile. It was good to see him like this.
    “What are you doing these days?” he asked.
    I told him about just having graduated from college, but not finding the job I wanted yet, and so I was working retail. “A cosmetics store here in the mall, of all things. I’ve really hit the big time.” My words were drenched in sarcasm.
    “You do what you have to.”
    “True,” I said. I felt bad for being so sarcastic about my current job. There was nothing wrong with it. I had just been hoping for more. And since I had no idea what kind of work he might be doing, I had inadvertently run the risk of making him feel like I was going to judge him.
    He fidgeted with the items he was holding. “I figured you would have been running Sea World by now.”
    I had always wanted to work in marine biology, and Wes had been my biggest cheerleader for chasing my dream. Not because he was particularly interested in it, but he knew I was and he knew it’s what I wanted to do with my life.
    “Uh, no,” I said.
    “I’m kidding. I know you hate that kind of thing. Or used to.”
    “Oh, I still do,” I said. “But, yeah, you’re close. I should be doing something related to the ocean, but it’s been tough finding a job. Anyway, an undergrad and grad school degree later, here I am at the mall selling lipstick and mascara.”
    I asked him what he was up to lately, and as he told me about his job as a wine sales rep, he was having a hard time keeping eye contact with me. He looked over my shoulders, left and right; he fumbled with the hangers on a rack of clothes, nervously straightening them out and lining them up; he even looked down at the floor a few times. Was he nervous? Embarrassed about something? Worried that I’d ask for the details of his seven-year absence?
    I wasn’t going to get too deep into it, but I did wonder something. “Did you stay around here or are you just coming back?”
    He took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair. Not like he was annoyed. Total nervous move. I kind of wished I hadn’t asked the question.
    “Just moving back,” he said. “Actually, I’ve been back about six months now.”
    He asked where I had gone to college. I told him, and then said I’d been back in town about a year, and then I wasn’t sure what else to say. This was a complete shock, running into him.
    “Are you busy?” I asked. “Want to grab lunch, maybe?” There might have been a little too much pleading in my voice, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted to talk to him, but standing here in the middle of the store wasn’t a good place, and it felt like any second it could be over. Getting something to eat, sitting down, was much more preferable.
    He wasn’t looking at me when I asked. He’d been looking over my shoulder again. But his eyes darted back to mine after he heard what I said. Those eyes—I remember them well, but they had a somewhat different look now, brighter, more…alive. There was a sad sort of deadness in his eyes right before he left back then. It was one of the things I thought of most whenever he came to mind.
    “Ah, you know…I actually have to get back to work. I’m just on a break now.”
    Trying to hide my disappointment, I reached into my bag and cast my gaze downward so he wouldn’t see the regret in my eyes.