Stupid Movie Lines Read Online Free Page A

gunfire in
Runestone,
1990
    On Cops, Viewpoints About Genius Aliens and:
    He makes me feel like a moron—but I like him.
    Police chief (Kenneth Edwards) discussing the Venusian who has come to Earth to save us from our nuclear sins in
Stranger from Venus,
1954, starring Patricia Neal
    On Cops, Wisdom from:
    The minute the doctor falls in love with the patient, he’s about as useful as a papoose.
    Policeman Thomas Mitchell, to the psychiatrist (Lew Ayres) who’s falling in love with one of his twin patients in
The Dark Mirror,
1946
    On Cossack Predictions:
    The time is soon coming where a Cossack will have something better to do than carry horses around the house.
    One far-seeing Cossack having a discussion with his buddies in
Taras Bulba,
1962
    On Costars, Helpful Definitional Moments of:
    Captain:
Well, the magnetic field on the dark side could exert a gravitational pull, and, uh …
    Copilot:
And that means that this is a natural decompression chamber, doesn’t it, sir?
    The captain (Sonny Tufts) forgetting his line and being helped by his costar, Douglas Fowley, in
Cat Women of the Moon,
1954
    On Could You Repeat That, Please?:
    I am Criswell. For many years I have told you the almost unbelievable, related the unreal, and showed it to be more than fact.
    Promo for
Night of the Ghouls,
1959, featuring Criswell, the TV psychic
    On Courtroom Defenses, Great Moments in:
    It’s not a crime to be a great lay.
    Willem Dafoe defending Madonna to the district attorney in
Body of Evidence,
1993
    On Cover Girls, Final Word on:
    They’re Over-Exposed
    But Not Under-Developed!
    Ad for
Cover Girl Models,
1975
    On Craters Filled with Bubbling Molten Rock, Brilliant Deductions About:
    This crater must be a lava pit!
    Time-traveling elder scientist Dr. Gordon (Abraham Sofaer) examining a crater filled with bubbling lava in
Journey to the Center of Time,
1967
    On Creativity, Asinine Thoughts About:
    Without creativity, without life, then you are truly unable to go straight up the Devil’s ass, look him right in the face, smile, and survive.
    Nicolas Cage as a philosopher/TV repairman/stud in
Zandalee,
1991
    On Critics, Overwrought:
    With you, sex and art go hand in hand. Sculptor … pagan … alleycat!
    Art critic (DeForest Kelley) to sculptor/tramp Susan Hayward in
Where Love Has Gone,
1964
    On Crocodile Priestesses in Love:
    Jungle Kiss!!
When she looked into his eyes, felt his arms around her—she was no longer Tura, mysterious white goddess of the jungle tribes—she wasno longer the frozen-hearted high priestess under whose hypnotic spell the worshipers of the great crocodile god meekly bowed—she was a girl in love!
    SEE the ravening charge of the hundred sacred CROCODILES!
    Ad for
Her Jungle Love,
1938
    On Crouch Bunnies, Tough Talk to:
    So if any of you crouch bunnies thinks that me and my men are going to go on protecting and serving the interests of amen snorters like you, you gotta start forking over the coin … right now!
    Detective (John Saxon) to a worried city council when asked about the horrible murders in town, in
Blood Beach,
1981
    On Cult Leaders, Homey:
    Don’t you
ever
touch the sacrificial fluids … okeydokey?
    Psycho cult leader Sam Raimi to follower (played by his real-life brother) who was dipping his hands in a bucket of blood in
Thou Shalt Not Kill … Except,
1987
    On Cute Female Assistants, Typically Dumb 1960s Variety:
    Female assistant:
What makes you think they’re in that time co-ord … co-ord …
    Male scientist:
Coordinate!
    Smart scientist in the time-travel laboratory helping his not-so-smart female assistant with that tough word “coordinate” in
Journey to the Center of Time,
1967
    On Cuteness, Excessive:
    Boys, boys! Calm down! Haven’t you heard of the word “compromisation”?
    Ginger Spice (Geri Halliwell), being cute, in
Spice World,
1997
    On Cutesy Orphans, Ones We’d Rather Not Meet:
    Goshers! Chow! Is sure smelling good, Mr. Dealey-Buddy! Is tasting good,