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Big Magdalena - "
    "Big Magdalena? I may be five foot ten, but I'm skinny as a mop handle!"
    "Ach" - he turned a lovely shade of salmon under his wispy whiskers - "there are things besides height and weight to
    consider." I would have liked to think he was referring to my bosoms, but since I have a concave chest, there wasn't enough
    evidence there to hang my hat on. Besides, his pale blue eyes were focused quite clearly on my probing proboscis.
    "Why, I never! It is an honest Yoder nose. Just consider yourself lucky, buster, because you Berkeys have a little Yoder blood
    too.”
    Strubbly Sam seemed startled. Then I remembered that he was not originally from around these parts, but from one of those
    far-flung Amish communities, like Nebraska or Paraguay. According to what Mama told me, Strubbly Sam had been on his way to
    Lancaster to visit some distant relatives, and when it was almost dark, sought accommodations with an Amish family for the night.
    The family he picked just happened to be the bishop, who just happened to have three of the most beautiful daughters ever to
    descend from Eve. Strubbly Sam never made it to Lancaster, and never returned to Paraguay, or Nebraska, or wherever he was
    from. Perhaps those foreign Berkeys lacked Yoder blood.
    "Okay, so maybe there aren't Yoders where you come from, but you've seen plenty enough here to know that my nose is not
    unique."
    "Ach, it isn't just me who speaks of Big Magdalena."
    "What? You mean the entire community gossips about my shnoz?"
    He removed his hat, revealing strubbly hair. "But there are six Magdalena Yoders in Bedford County, and nine in Somerset. It
    is only a name, Big Magdalena."
    "Don't call me that!" I snapped.
    He twirled the straw hat on his left index finger. "You are angry with me now, yah?"
    I remembered the eggs. "Merely miffed, dear. So, Strubbly Sam, what is it you have on your mind?"
    He gazed at my new bread-maker, a machine Freni refuses to use. "You are having guests, yah?"
    "That's what an inn is all about, dear. But I hate to disappoint you if you think you're going to get a glimpse of Hollywood. For
    one thing, no one has arrived yet, and for another, this is not a Hollywood crowd."
    "Soldiers, yah?"
    "Why, that gossipy little Freni! And they're not soldiers-they're veterans."
    "But veterans of a war, yah. Is that such a good idea?"
    "Not you too !" I wailed.
    "Big Magdalena - " I glared at him.
    "Ach, Magdalena, our people are committed to peace."
    "Quite true, dear, but these are elderly men converging to reminisce. They're not going to be waging war on the countryside."
    "Yah, but - "
    I held up a quieting hand. "And if they do, you can take refuge in my basement."
    Strubbly Sam smiled sadly. "What does Lustige Freni have to say about this?"
    "Merry Freni? Boy, do you have a wrong number!"
    He frowned, obviously confused.
    "That woman is as merry as a mule with a burr under its saddle," I said kindly.
    "So she's against it, yah?"
    "Is that what you think? Well, she's coming in to work today," I said smugly. "Why don't you ask her yourself?"
    The threat of a chance encounter with Merry Freni sent Strubbly Sam speedily on his way. In fact he left so quickly he left
    behind his wire basket.
    Samantha Burk and her husband, John, were the first guests to arrive. I was amazed at how tiny Samantha was-even her
    hair was short. I couldn't imagine how such tiny hands, barely larger than cat paws, could span an octave under any
    circumstances. But I was downright taken aback by her striking resemblance to an acquaintance of mine.
    "Say, you wouldn't happen to be related to Abigail Timberlake?" I asked as I wrote down their license plate number.
    "I beg your pardon?"
    "Feisty little southern gal, owns an antique store called the Den of Antiquity?"
    "Never heard of her."
    "Hmm. You're the spitting image of Abby - well, except that you have almond-shaped eyes and are a good ten years older."
    Samantha smiled. "The 'almond' eyes, as you so nicely