My Homework Ate My Homework Read Online Free

with what you have. We actors call this “improvising,” or, for short, “improv.”
    “It will surely do its best, but I am not wholly inexperienced in these matters, my dear. Why, once, when I was no bigger than you, I tangled with a rampaging snow leopard—”
    “Forgive the interruption, sir, but maybe we can save your tales of heroism for a later time?”
    He pretends to be embarrassed. “No, forgive
me
, miss! You are absolutely right!”
    He inches toward the desk, crouched like a wrestler. Bandito quits hissing and startsmaking happy clucking sounds. He likes my father. Maybe it’s because Father likes him. Father likes everyone. Even mustelids. Before you know it, Bandito is climbing Father’s arm to his shoulder and starts nuzzling his neck. It’s almost cute.
    Almost.
    “The savage beast has been tamed!” Father proclaims. “Say, that tickles, savage beast.” He faux-giggles.
    “Please put him back in his cage,” I say. “I want to see how much damage he did to my homework. He already ate my stroopwafels.”
    “The scoundrel,” Father says as he locks Bandito up. “We’ll add theft to the charges of attempted escape and wanton destruction of property.”
    “Just look at my homework! Ruined! All that hard work gone to waste!”
    Actually, I’d barely started it. I have eight math assignments to make up, but every time I think about starting them, I stop breathing. My body knows it’s unfair to ask it to do math on vacation. One time I did stick it out and got through two problems before collapsing onto the floor,gasping for air. And now those problems are in shreds!
    I slam the rolltop shut, almost on my father’s fingers.
    “Sorry,” I say. “I just …… can’t bear to look at it!”
    “I understand, cupcake.”
    “I was almost
finished
.” I start tightening my face muscles, flattening my nose, visualizing huge gold hoop earrings.
    “I guess you’ll have to redo them then.” He gives me a gentle squeeze. “Don’t worry. I’ll help you.”
    “
Redo
them?” I twist away from him, and tears actually fly from my eyes. Excellent! “I can’t possibly
redo
them. School starts back up on
Tuesday
. Tuesday! That’s only”—I count on my fingers—“only three days! And I have to take care of the beast. And record his behavior. I don’t have
time
. I just don’t have t-t-t- …”
    I fling myself at him and faux-bawl.
    “Oh, now, now … is it really worth all
that
?” Father coos, patting my back. “We’ll work it out. You’ll see. Everything’s going to be fine. Just fine.”
    I smile. There will be no homework for me.

“Good! The ferret’s back in the cage,” Mother says, coming back into the room.
    “Fur!” Abalina says.
    “Yes,” Father says, “the fur is back in the cage, but, sadly, not before he chewed up our scholarly eldest daughter’s mathematics homework.”
    My mother looks at me. I do my best to look devastated.
    “Well, you’ll have to redo it,” she says.
    I gasp. “
Redo
it? I can’t redo it! School starts on—”
    “We’ve been down this road, Mother,” Father says. “Apparently, Zaritza is overwhelmed with other work.”
    I let him take care of this.
    “No, no, no,” Mother says. “Zaritza volunteered to watch the ferret, and she let him escape. It’s her own fault he ruined her homework.”
    “Can we talk about this without blaming?” I ask. I’ve overheard her say that to father when they argue.
    “This is not about blame. This is about natural consequences.”
    “Duh!” Abby says, looking like she’s about to cry. She doesn’t like the arguing.
    “Now look what you did,” I say to my mother. “Now the baby’s crying!”
    “I thought we weren’t blaming?”
    “Why don’t I take our younger daughter into the other room?” Father says, and takes Abby from my mother and heads for the door.
    “Father!” I call after him, but he’s already out of the room and shutting the door behind him. The coward.
    “Sit