Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice Read Online Free Page A

yourself about yourself and on how
objectively you can evaluate the person you're considering as a
Master or slave.
    Who Are You?
    What interpersonal, technical and life skills do you bring to
the table?
    Before I begin this section, a comment: I've heard people say
that they've had (let us say) five years of experience at some
skill, yet when you observe them at that skill, they don't appear to
be very good at it. From this, I've learned to distinguish between
someone who has had one year of experience that they repeated
five times versus someone who has had five years of progressive experience leading to skill or knowledge mastery. I further
draw the conclusion that some people are dead-set to learn little
or nothing from life's experiences and will go out of their way to
do so.

    So, here are some tough questions - tough, in large part because
few people spend the time to think them through before starting a
new relationship or maintaining the one they're in. Starting right
now and lasting throughout this book, I'm going to be putting
forth questions designed to cause you to stop and think. And
act. When possible, I'll provide tips and techniques and nudges,
but you MAY have to seek out experts and courses to build your
strength in certain fields.
    "Few people think more than two or three times a year. I
have made an international reputation for myself by thinking
once or twice a week."
    G.B. Shaw
    "Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the
reason why so few people engage in it."
    Henry Ford
    A Guide to Thinking:
    • Think more slowly.
    • Don't limit yourself to two alternatives.
    • Don't confuse hindsight for insight.
    • Think on paper.
    • Don't set out to prove yourself right.
    0 Do learn from mistakes.
    • Ask questions.
    What are your skills and personality assessment scores?
I'm an educational sociologist by training, but spent my career in
business settings. My slave is an RN-paralegal. We are used
to working differently. When we first came together as a Family
there were some stress points. Given a task to look something
up, my slave worked any problem to DEATH and created a paper
trail of EVERYTHING done - reams of copies of Internet find ings, for example. In an effort to figure out how to approach her
and how best to use her ample skills, I put us through a battery of
tests. So, I pass this tip on to you: use some objective measures
to figure out how YOU work and how your partner or prospective
partner works.

    • What's are the Meyers-Briggs scores for you and your
partner? Have you studied how your type gets along
with his/her type? (Hint: the personality test offered on
alt.com is essentially a Meyers-Briggs and it enables
you to compare YOUR test against any other member
of alt.com. If you and your slave take their test, the
resulting analysis and compatibility discussions can
give you a good starting point.)
    • How do you take in (process) information? There are
a number of ways that you can think about the way
you learn. One of the most common ways of cutting
this topic describes three basic modalities in which we
convert information to memory: visual (learning by
seeing), auditory (learning by hearing), and kinesthetic
(learning by doing). Most people use one predominant
modality, but some use a balance between two or even
all three. As it relates to M/s relations, not only must
you be in touch with the way YOU learn, but also be
sensitive to the ways your current or potential slave
learns.
    • What are your preferred working styles? Are you
mostly a fact finder or are you mostly good at follow
through? Are you a quick start or are you better as an
implementor? We found that the Kolbe A test (http://
www.kolbe.com) was the single best test to reveal how
each of us worked as individuals and what we had to
know (and do) to improve our abilities to work together.
Yes, there is a modest cost. YES, it's worth it.

    A true