Four Shades of Recovery: Boxed Set Read Online Free

different but I have a better understanding of her needs now. I can accept her for who and what she is, at this point. She’s not perfect and neither am I. We’ll never be perfect, but she cares about me,” Megan admits for the first time.
     
    In the past, Megan remained bitter and angry about Abby. Her revelation surprises but also encourages me. She’s letting me into her heart and head.
     
    “Did you miss me?” I’m already pressing my case and it embarrasses me.
     
    “Of course, Matt. That’s why I’ve returned to Portland. I realize how much you mean to me.”
     
    Her face appears earnest and caring. She holds her arms out to me. That’s all the encouragement I need. Without another thought, I’m off the couch and pulling Megan into my arms. I’m such a wus!
     

Chapter Three – Demons
     
    Megan’s POV
     
    I hold Matt in my arms and I can feel him trembling. He’s trying so hard to resist me and I understand why. He’s so sexy and gorgeous but he’s hurting from when and how I left him last year. I feel protected and happy in his arms. Making love with him rates as one of the highlights in my life thus far. Some would call it a self-actualizing experience. I call it the best fuck ever. What an amazing lover.
     
    I know Matt loves me, body and soul. I want to feel the same way about him. For some reason, probably dating back to my childhood, I can’t surrender to that emotion. At least, not yet. Possibly, not ever. Matt’s arms pull me into a snug embrace and his soft lips kiss my head and face. He looks down at me with nothing but desire and love in his gentle hazel eyes. I could gaze into those eyes for a long time, and I do.
     
    “What do you want from me, Megan?” His voice is hoarse with emotion as he asks a question that he suspects has a painful response. He’s so brave.
     
    “I want to spend time with you, Matt. That means I want to give our relationship another chance. What do you want?” I look directly into his chiseled jaw and pet it as I speak.
     
    The expression on his face tells me that he’s soothed by my words and actions. “My feelings for you haven’t changed Megan. You know that I’m completely crazy about you, of course. I haven’t been with anyone since you left.”
     
    He makes his declaration sound like a defeat. I suspect he’s laid his cards out on the table today as a challenge to me. The last time he declared his love for me I bolted in fear. He’s testing me. I have no intention of bolting now though.
     
    My body sags with relief. I can’t afford to lose Matt’s love. I need it to prop up my own self-esteem and to rebuild our bond.
     
    “Matt I’m thrilled to know that you still care for me. I feared that you’d given up or that you’d gone back to your old BDSM lifestyle. Grateful doesn’t begin to cover how happy I feel right now,” I utter and look into his face with trust and affection.
     
    “Megan how do you feel about me? I need to know or this relationship stops here,” Matt asks then pulls back from our embrace and crosses his arms. We’re now standing face to face with some distance between us. His face looks grave. He’s trying to brace himself and control the situation. I know what I say next determines our future. Therefore, I choose my words carefully.
     
    “Matt, can you give our relationship another chance? I want you and us to work but I need some time. My feelings for you are strong and I care for you so very much,” I say then reach out and touch his crossed arms.
     
    “Are you telling me that you don’t love me, Megan?” He pulls back from my touch and spits the question out with mounting distress. His eyes grow large and his forehead constricts as he stares at me with a forlorn look on his face.
     
    “I feel drawn to you on so many levels, baby. You make me feel safe, happy, sexually satisfied, and cherished. Whatever I feel for you is the closest to love that I’ve ever had…for anyone,” I admit while