Everything We Keep: A Novel Read Online Free

bad can it be? I could have handled it.” A traffic jam of ideas bumped around my head. I didn’t have much in my savings, and the only joint account James and I had was the one we used to pay the mortgage and utilities. His contributions to that account ended when he’d been pronounced dead. The cash in his personal bank accounts went to Thomas, who gave it all to me in a check at James’s funeral. A check I couldn’t stomach cashing. I didn’t feel it was my money to spend.
    Maybe I could refinance the house. Or sell it, move back in with my parents temporarily.
    “The Goat’s too far gone to salvage.” My thoughts skidded to a stop with Dad’s confession. He dipped his head, took a deep breath. I thought he was disappointed until he raised his face and I realized he was ashamed. “You’d be scraping pennies to pay for flour to bake bread. The last thing your mother and I want is to watch you file for bankruptcy.”
    “Bankruptcy?” I exclaimed.
    Mom nodded. Her eyes sheened. “We mortgaged this building and took a second on the house, and we still couldn’t make ends meet. We also owe some of our suppliers. They’ve been generous enough to waive interest fees, but we still have to pay them. The new owner has agreed to assume our debts, except the house mortgage.”
    “I hadn’t realized it was that bad,” I said.
    Dad put his arm around Mom. “After the shopping center across the street was remodeled and those two franchise restaurants opened, we all watched them take away our customers.”
    “I had ideas to bring them back. I was going to expand our dinner menu, brighten the dining area, add live music on Thursday and Saturday nights—”
    “All ideas we’ve considered, which aren’t enough to repay the loans and make a profit.”
    I twisted my apron. It was a pretty good guess the buyer was a developer who would level the building. There had to be a way to keep The Goat. I’d already lost James. I couldn’t lose this, too. So many memories existed within these walls, tangled inside with scents of rosemary roasted potatoes, and whiskey-glazed corned beef. “I wish I would have known sooner. I could have helped.”
    “We’d planned to say something, but . . .” Dad scratched his head. “Well, James died and there never seemed to be a good time to explain. No parent wants to be a burden to their children. You were already . . . um, well . . .”
    An emotional mess.
    I let go of the apron I’d been worrying and smoothed the wrinkled material in long, tempered strokes. I felt edgy, without direction and purpose. I felt lost. “What am I supposed to do now? The Goat is all I know.” Fear of the unknown weighed heavily in my voice.
    Mom latched on to my hands. “Think of this as an exciting new opportunity. You can try something different.”
    “Like what?” I pulled my hands from hers and tore off the apron. Their news was starting to sink in.
    Mom stole a glance at Dad. “Well, your father and I feel that now more than ever is a good time for you to figure out who you are and what you want to do.”
    My eyes widened. “What do you mean ‘now more than ever’? Because The Goat’s been sold, or because James is gone?”
    Dad cleared his throat. “A little bit of both.”
    I gawked.
    “You and James had been together since you were what, eight? You’d been inseparable.”
    “Are you accusing me of being too dependent on James?”
    “No, not exactly,” Dad hedged.
    “Yes,” Mom said simply.
    I stared at my parents.
    “Look, Aimee, we all miss James very much. Your father and I feel as if we’ve lost a son. But for the first time in your adult life it’s just you. You have the education and experience to do what you want. Start your own restaurant if you really want to run one.”
    How could I even think about starting a restaurant from scratch when I could barely process the news about The Goat? I wadded the apron and tossed it onto the counter. A flour cloud rose