Charlie Joe Jackson's Guide to Not Growing Up Read Online Free

grabbed a root beer. “What’s up?”
    â€œIt’s time,” she said, as if I was supposed to know exactly what she was talking about. I didn’t.
    â€œWhat’s time?”
    She leaned in, her lips only about four inches from my ear. There was a time not that long ago where her being that close to me would have made me sweat, stammer, and possibly pass out. But that was then. Things were completely different now.
    â€œJake,” she said, mysteriously.
    â€œW-what about him?” Okay fine, I stammered a bit. Old habits die hard.
    â€œYou need to tell him something for me. Something he’s not going to like.”
    Wait a second. Was she saying what I think she was saying?
    My head went a little fuzzy. You have to understand—entire school years went by while I daydreamed about hearing those words. But like I said—that was then, and this is now.
    â€œWhat?” I asked. “What do you need me to tell him?”
    â€œShhhh!” she whispered, way too loudly to be considered an actual whisper. “I don’t want to do anything about it until after graduation!”
    â€œSorry, but this doesn’t make any sense.”
    Hannah twirled a straw around in her mouth. “We’re about to go to high school, and we’re going to meet a whole bunch of new kids, and it just seems like the right time, like it makes sense, you know?”
    â€œNo!” I objected, probably a little too loudly. “You’re like, the best couple in the school, not counting Phil and Celia.” I was referring to Phil Manning and Celia Barbarossa, who’d been going out for so long people were starting to call them Philarossa. I swigged my soda, then refilled. “Plus, I just don’t think you should break up with him today of all days. That would be terrible.”
    Hannah burst out laughing.
    â€œBreak up with him? What??”
    I felt my face start to turn red. “Why, what were you talking about?”
    â€œI just was going to say Jake needs to think about maybe getting contact lenses, that’s all!” Hannah said, between gasps of laughter. “And start dressing better.”
    â€œOh,” I said.
    She wiped her eyes. “That’s like, totally hilarious that you thought I wanted to break up with him! Oh my God! No, it’s just that it’s high school, you know, and he needs to look good, and grow up a little bit, that’s all I’m saying.”
    I suddenly got a little annoyed. “Why is everyone all obsessed about the future, and what’s next, and growing up all of a sudden? I’m starting to get sick of it. What’s wrong with right now?” I polished off my second glass of root beer. “Man, this is turning into a lousy birthday.”
    Hannah’s eyes went wide. “Oh my gosh! Your birthday! I totally forgot!” She turned around and shouted, “Everybody! It’s Charlie Joe’s birthday!!”
    Well, that did it. Everyone came running over and started pounding me on the back, shouting “Way to go!” and “Congratulations, Charlie Joe! You’re the man!” But I didn’t exactly feel like the man, right then. I felt a little confused, to tell you the truth.
    Jake came over and put his arm around Hannah. She glanced quickly at me, then smiled at Jake—and I noticed Jake was starting to sprout a little mustache.
    Yup, middle school was definitely over.
    Pete Milano came over and put me in a headlock. “Happy birthday, Charlie Joe! Here’s my present!” He threw in a couple of noogies for good measure.
    â€œUh, Pete?” I gasped. “That kind of hurts.”
    â€œBirthdays are supposed to hurt,” he said, but then he let me go.
    I tried to catch my breath. “What’s up?”
    â€œOh you know, dude, the usual,” Pete said. “This party’s a little lame.”
    â€œWhat do you mean?” I said.
    â€œI mean, this