Broken Obsession - Part Two Read Online Free

thinking
that I’d never be able to quench my eagerness of wanting to be near
him. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that he had
been feeling the very same thing. Come to think of it, there wasn’t
a moment I recall that whenever I was at a family gathering,
Eduardo wasn’t right by my side. We had this mysterious connection,
him and I; a baffling longing of wanting a void to be
fulfilled.
    But, oh God, how my emotions were tortured by just
being around him! All I wanted to do was touch him when I saw him
at those family gatherings. And to be brutally honest, temptation
sucks. Pining away for someone also sucks. Your emotions go
haywire, you feel like you can’t breathe, you don’t want to eat and
your heart is all twisted. All you want to do is just be with that
person and it kills you every day because you can’t.
     
    Eduardo and I didn’t become lovers for nearly ten
years, in fact, we were friends first and maybe that’s how it
should have been. Knowing the timeline and the outcome of our
affair, I would have done things differently though. I just wanted
to hold him, hug him, kiss him, lay on him, get naked and have him
inside of me— all day long! Yes, it was obsessive, yes, it was
immoral, but I couldn’t ignore what my body kept telling me. We
weren’t related, we had no blood ties—he just happened to be my
husband’s older brother. To be attracted to your brother-in-law…Why
was that so taboo?
     
    There were no good reasons behind my fascination with
Eduardo Sanchez, just like there are no good reasons behind a cat’s
appeal to catnip.
     
    How do you explain the unexplainable? I was young; I
only had one other boyfriend other than Victor and married right
out of high school. How was I supposed to know how sexual
attraction would affect me? Even at work, when I first started
working at Eduardo’s law firm, when he would walk passed my desk;
my heart would do flip-flops. I never got any work done; his body
and his face would always preoccupy my thoughts and definitely
overpower my work load. It got so bad I would oftentimes cry in my
car on my way home on the freeway and wipe away my tears as soon as
I pulled into the garage so Victor wouldn’t notice. I wished I were
always somewhere else and constantly with him until the night
Eduardo confessed his true mind-set.
     
    Unbelievable…I was in total disbelief that he had
been feeling the very same way? All those years I had been
attracted to him, desiring his lips on mine, Eduardo had desired my
lips on his?
     
    I feel very lucky right now. I know I tried to commit
suicide and I know now by going through a lot of therapy that I
should have thought through my pain. But at the time, I wasn’t
thinking clearly and I don’t know how else to explain those
horrible moments of wanting to take my own life and I don’t want to
make excuses for what I did, but you don’t think; all you see is
the pain and the throbbing piled high on top of further misery
whenever you think of who caused you that torture. I just wanted to
end it, more than that; I wanted to teach him a lesson. The man was
damn spoiled, Eduardo had always been spoiled, always getting what
he wanted and what I wanted didn’t matter. I wanted him to leave
his wife (my sister-in-law, Leticia) for me. If he had truly loved
and cared about me like he was constantly confessing, then why
wasn’t he willing to get a divorce? I was willing to leave Victor
and my kids for him, why wasn’t Eduardo willing to change direction
for me? Was it really his family convictions? Was it his pride? Or
was it just him being a little overindulged?
     
    So at that point, I just didn’t care; I wanted to end
it all. I hated being the other woman; hated feeling dirty because
I was a cheater and the only way I was going to cleanse myself, was
to wash it all away, to stop it and that’s just what I tried to
do.
     
    And I really don’t remember all that much about that
day. All I remember is