Boy Meets Girl - Say Hello to Courtship Read Online Free Page B
Author: Joshua Harris
Tags: Spirituality, Spiritual Growth, Christian Life - General
areas-we bring Him glory Our actions say that His commands are good and that He deserves to be obeyed.
2. The selfless desire to do what's best for the other person. This important quality of a God-glorifying relationship is summed up in the Golden Rule: "Do to others as you would have them do to you" (Luke 6:31). It's simple, and yet it encompasses every facet of a relationship.
Sincere, Christlike love for the guy or girl you're in a relationship with is the natural outgrowth of love for God. The two are so closely intertwined that it's difficult to tell where one ends and the other begins-they weave in and out of each other. This is why when Jesus was asked to name the
36
greatest commandment, He gave two-to love God and to love others. They can't be separated. When we serve others, we're serving our Lord (Matthew 25:40). Jesus laid His life down for us to show us what love is, and He calls us to follow His example (1 John 3:16). The Word tells us to humble ourselves, to consider others better than ourselves, and to look to their interests first (Philippians 2:3-4).
We glorify God in our relationships when we put our needs aside and base our decisions on what serves the interests of the other person. Listen to the kind of questions we ask when we're guided by a selfless desire to do what's best for another:
Is starting this relationship now what's best for him?
Will expressing all my feelings now serve her?
Are my actions encouraging him to love God more?
Am 1 communicating clearly and in a way that helps her?
Does the way 1 dress encourage him to have a pure thought life?
Will kissing her be what's best for her in the long run?
A selfless desire to do what's best for the other person can guide us in the big and small decisions of a relationship. It's not tedious. It's an expression of sincere love and the defining mark of a Christian relationship. "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another" (John 13:35).
3. The humble embrace of community.
We're going to take an in-depth look at the importance of community in chapter 8. For now it's enough to say that if God's glory is truly our passion in a relationship, we won't be too proud to admit that we need help. The Bible states, "The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice" (Proverbs 12:15).
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We need our parent's wisdom. We need the support of our church. We need pastors to remind us of God's commands. We need Christian friends to comfort and encourage us. We need the perspective and wisdom of fellow believers of all ages as we walk the path to marriage. And it won't end there. After we get married, we'll need this community of support even more!
Andy and Lori, the couple I told you about at the beginning of this chapter, are a good example of a couple that embraces Christian community. Even though they're away at college, they've faithfully sought wisdom and accountability in their local church. Since Lori doesn't have a Christian father, she asked Buck, her pastor, to play the part of protector and advisor. Andy meets with his dad as well as with Buck and a group of guys from church, who, as he puts it, "get his rear in line." Andy has told them where he and Lori can be tempted, and they are faithful to ask how he's doing and to challenge him when necessary
Whatever our circumstances or our age, we all need to embrace the community of faith. God gave us the local church because we really do need one another.
4. A commitment to guard the sacredness of sex. Sexual sin is like spray-painting the Mona Lisa. It's taking God's masterpiece of sexual intimacy between husband and wife and defacing it-robbing it of it's wonder and purpose.
When God's glory is the priority in a relationship, you'll find two people who view sex as something so precious that they refuse to let impatience and lust steal from it before marriage. As we'll see in chapter 9, Christians' motivation for abstaining from sex before
2. The selfless desire to do what's best for the other person. This important quality of a God-glorifying relationship is summed up in the Golden Rule: "Do to others as you would have them do to you" (Luke 6:31). It's simple, and yet it encompasses every facet of a relationship.
Sincere, Christlike love for the guy or girl you're in a relationship with is the natural outgrowth of love for God. The two are so closely intertwined that it's difficult to tell where one ends and the other begins-they weave in and out of each other. This is why when Jesus was asked to name the
36
greatest commandment, He gave two-to love God and to love others. They can't be separated. When we serve others, we're serving our Lord (Matthew 25:40). Jesus laid His life down for us to show us what love is, and He calls us to follow His example (1 John 3:16). The Word tells us to humble ourselves, to consider others better than ourselves, and to look to their interests first (Philippians 2:3-4).
We glorify God in our relationships when we put our needs aside and base our decisions on what serves the interests of the other person. Listen to the kind of questions we ask when we're guided by a selfless desire to do what's best for another:
Is starting this relationship now what's best for him?
Will expressing all my feelings now serve her?
Are my actions encouraging him to love God more?
Am 1 communicating clearly and in a way that helps her?
Does the way 1 dress encourage him to have a pure thought life?
Will kissing her be what's best for her in the long run?
A selfless desire to do what's best for the other person can guide us in the big and small decisions of a relationship. It's not tedious. It's an expression of sincere love and the defining mark of a Christian relationship. "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another" (John 13:35).
3. The humble embrace of community.
We're going to take an in-depth look at the importance of community in chapter 8. For now it's enough to say that if God's glory is truly our passion in a relationship, we won't be too proud to admit that we need help. The Bible states, "The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice" (Proverbs 12:15).
37
We need our parent's wisdom. We need the support of our church. We need pastors to remind us of God's commands. We need Christian friends to comfort and encourage us. We need the perspective and wisdom of fellow believers of all ages as we walk the path to marriage. And it won't end there. After we get married, we'll need this community of support even more!
Andy and Lori, the couple I told you about at the beginning of this chapter, are a good example of a couple that embraces Christian community. Even though they're away at college, they've faithfully sought wisdom and accountability in their local church. Since Lori doesn't have a Christian father, she asked Buck, her pastor, to play the part of protector and advisor. Andy meets with his dad as well as with Buck and a group of guys from church, who, as he puts it, "get his rear in line." Andy has told them where he and Lori can be tempted, and they are faithful to ask how he's doing and to challenge him when necessary
Whatever our circumstances or our age, we all need to embrace the community of faith. God gave us the local church because we really do need one another.
4. A commitment to guard the sacredness of sex. Sexual sin is like spray-painting the Mona Lisa. It's taking God's masterpiece of sexual intimacy between husband and wife and defacing it-robbing it of it's wonder and purpose.
When God's glory is the priority in a relationship, you'll find two people who view sex as something so precious that they refuse to let impatience and lust steal from it before marriage. As we'll see in chapter 9, Christians' motivation for abstaining from sex before
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