A Lost King: A Novel Read Online Free

time. Listen then. Do you think I should wear a hat? It’ll be hot and they say the afternoon sun is a danger to the brain.”
    â€œHave no fear,” he said, with his dry laugh.
    It was good to hear him laugh though it was usually at my expense.
    â€œI’ll bring you a surprise for supper,” I said. “And something special for dessert. How about some walnuts or figs? How about a chocolate cake with custard in the middle?”
    He said nothing.
    â€œHow would you like a new pipe?” I said. “How about one of those curved pipes? They curve out of sight down under your chin. Smoke curls up your nose and you forget where it’s coming from. You can put yourself under a spell, Pa. You’ll forget where you are.”
    â€œBuy the pipe.”
    â€œReally? Would you like it?”
    â€œDo what you please,” he said, turning away.
    I was leaving early so that I could ride downtown in the bus with Peggy Haley. Halfway up the alley I turned back. I wanted to look at my father again. He was watching me.
    â€œGood-by, Pa,” I said, waving to him.
    He turned away.

2
    I remember the hushed voice and loving touch of my mother. Her name was Jenny. She would come softly in the dark of morning to sit on my bed and hold my hand. She would kiss my eyes and whisper some surprising thing in my ear. It was easy for me to pretend that I was still dreaming.
    For a time I had this midnight cough. My mother would bring me hot wine with sugar in it and then she would rub my throat and chest with a clean burning salve. Dark beloved eyes came close to mine. Her breath was warm and sweet.
    â€œI’ll have to watch out for you,” she said.
    She whispered and kissed me as though hiding me in a safe secret place until morning. I used to cough and cough just to bring her to me. It was in the night that I realized she would never come to me again. All was lost but the dreaming.
    I didn’t stop that coughing right away. I went on with it and my sister Nina rubbed my chest for a few weeks. It was a different thing. Soon enough she tired of it.
    â€œMake him stop that coughing,” she said. “He’s fooling around.”
    â€œDid you hear?” said my father.
    He was drinking heavily in those days.
    â€œI can’t help it,” I said. “I really can’t.”
    To spite them I coughed and coughed. I was experimenting with harsh new coughs that tore at my throat. Sometimes they made me dizzy.
    â€œStop it!” said Nina. “I can’t stand it!”
    â€œYou’re breaking the rule,” said my father. “My last warning.”
    â€œRule? What rule?”
    â€œI just made a rule against coughing in the house at night. I’m sick of it and so I made a rule against it.”
    â€œHow can you do that?”
    â€œCough again and find out. Go ahead. Break the rule.”
    â€œI never heard of such a thing. It’s impossible.”
    â€œNow I made another rule.”
    â€œWhat is it?”
    â€œYou just broke it,” he said.
    â€œBut what was it?”
    â€œThe last rule is not another word out of you tonight! Not one!”
    I went to bed and cried myself to sleep. My father was worse than medicine and I decided he had never been a boy at all. Surely he had been born old and tough like a tree to block my way and spoil everything.
    Every day we were choosing up sides in the house. Nina and my father would be against me or I would be with Nina against my father. At times I was with my father against Nina. It was confusing. I would wake in the morning and try to remember whose side I was on. A bit of talk would change things around.
    â€œWhere’s your sister?” my father would say.
    â€œYou mean Nina?” I said, stalling for time as usual.
    â€œWhat a memory for names,” he said. “A prodigy.”
    I was against him.
    â€œNina’s washing her hair,” I said.
    â€œShe left dishes and garbage