51 Shades of Maggie, Liverpool Style Read Online Free Page B

sticky.’
    An Mr Big laughed an I think, fuck, I’ve never seen him laugh before, an it was so gorgeous I was drippin, an I said to him, ‘Mr Big, I think I ...’
    But he cut me off: ‘Margaret, don’t get attached to me, I’m not good as a boyfriend, I hurt people.’
    Then I said, ‘I hurt people too, I nearly bit your cock off goin over them speed ramps on Penny Lane.’
    An he said, ‘Let’s go back to the apartment and talk more. I don’t want to lose you.’
    Then I looked at him an his green eyes an his smiley mouth an his chinos with the stain on them an I said, ‘Yeah then.’ Then I was sittin in the back of the taxi on the way to his apartment, an I said, ‘These leather seats are makin me slide all over the joint – I’m soakin!’

Back-to-work Bap Wash
    When we got back to Mr Big’s flat I was so shagged out I nearly fell asleep on the bed. Problem was, I was scared of him handcuffin me to somethin or whippin the shit out of me if I fell asleep, so I kept one eye open. I thought he was in the shower cos I heard water runnin but then he came out of the bathroom an he was bollock naked an all sweaty from the steam of the bathroom. I thinks to myself, Holy fuck-a-roo, he’s a big ride.
    I jumped up to give him a good seein to an he said to me, ‘Hold on, Margaret. I want to take a bath with you.’
    â€˜You what?’
    Now I’ve seen in films, all the twats in the bath together makin love an I think to myself, that’s not how you bath yerself. It’s in, scrub your box an then out. But then I looked at his smiley mouth an his pecs an his big masterpiece, an I was moist all right. So I said, ‘Okay. But you have to promise not to try an drown me or electrocute me?’ Then he laughs again an turns to walk back into the bathroom an the horn overcomes me an I run up behind him like a dog on heat an smack him on the bum cheek.
    Then I looked at the bath an my heart sank. Oh fuck! It was one of those fancy ones that looked like half an egg, not attached to the wall nor anything. An I’m worrying about how the fuck I’m goin to fit my big arse an tits in there with him in there too. But as I’m standin, thinkin about causing a bathroom tsunami, he starts undressin me.
    Then the next minute I’m bollock naked too an this time I didn’t feel mortified – I was empowered. So I did a couple of Jumping Jacks so my tits bounced up an down an Mr Big thinks this is amazin.
    So he gets into the bath an then pulls me in an I was sittin in between his legs with my back to him, an then he said, ‘Margaret, I’m going to wash you now.’
    â€˜Wash me? You havin a laugh?’
    â€˜Just go with the flow.’
    An he gets a sponge an starts washin my baps, an all I wanted to do was burst out laughin – I didn’t know where to look! I was gettin my baps washed by Mr Big from the Dole! They should give out ‘Crisis Bap Washes’ or a ‘Back-til-work Bap Wash’ for dirty horny whores down in the Dole! That would get some of them off the scratch.
    Then he starts rubbin the soap on the sponge an it’s all goin frothy, an I have a fair idea of where that is goin next. Then I felt a prick in my back an I said, ‘Fuck, I hope that’s a soap on a rope!’ An then he laughs, an doesn’t he start to wash my Mary with the soapy sponge! An he was going for it – back an forth, up an down, clockwise then anti-clockwise.
    After Mr Big had scrubbed my muff to death, he starts massagin it an I said, ‘What are you doin down there? French plaitin or what? Did you scrub Mrs Robinson’s fanny?’
    An then he said, ‘I don’t want to talk about the past.’ It got all awkward after that and he said it was time for me to go home. No overnight? Am I some sort of emotionally retarded twat magnet? I jumped up and pulled all my clothes on. He could