White Ninja Read Online Free

mind.
    â€˜Adzuki bean?’ I ask.
    Elecktra rolls her eyes. ‘Adzuki beans are for losers. Jelly bean — here have the black one, I hate them.’
    â€˜Don’t let Mum catch you eating sugar for breakfast. You know the rule.’
    â€˜Yeah, slows down my reflexes, blah, blah, blah. They were pretty good back there.’
    She snaps her head back to elongate her neck and pops a handful of jelly beans into her mouth. I watch them slide down her throat. My mouth waters.
    Elecktra shakes her head with a sugar buzz. ‘So do you think Jarrod will like my hair?’ she asks.
    â€˜What do you care if Jarrod likes your hair? He wants to leave Year Twelve to go full time at the car wash.’
    I hate listening to her stories about boys. I know she only tells me as a rehearsal before telling her friends.
    Elecktra stops walking for a second, throws another handful of jelly beans in her mouth and chews while thinking.
    â€˜It’s like, the other day he said to visit him at work. So I went casual — flat boots, not heels.’
    â€˜What happened?’ I ask.
    â€˜Well, nothing. But I told him what I wanted. I said, hey, I think we should act like grown-ups and if you want to be my boyfriend, just say so and I’ll tell everyone. Make it official.’
    â€˜You did not say that.’
    â€˜No. But can you help me break up with Jarrod?’ She grabs my arm and tugs on it. ‘I’m going to say it to him.’
    â€˜Jarrod the car-washer?’
    â€˜I have another version with “loser” in it,’ she offers.
    â€˜Are you even dating? And how many boys have I helped you break up with?’
    â€˜He walks in the gate with me every day. You know you don’t walk through Gate One with just anyone.’
    My heart folds in on itself as I think of the school gates. I dread going to school. It’s exhausting. Not because of classes or PE, but because I’m nervous all day. I never feel completely comfortable. Sometimes I walk through the common area like I’m going somewhere really important and then just wait in the toilet for twenty minutes. If I look like I’ve got something important to do, I feel like people won’t notice I don’t have anyone to talk to. Other times I’ll pretend to forget the combination to my locker. I’ll look at the kids aroundme like, Great — of all days! , then I’ll shrink my world to that tiny dial and lock out the laughter and the looks. If I’m dealing with my locker, I don’t have to deal with them. The library is an option, but I can’t go there every day. On really cold days the popular girls claim top spot in front of the heaters.
    â€˜Are you listening to me?’ Elecktra shakes me gently.
    I turn to her. ‘Elecktra, do you ever feel like hiding?’
    â€˜Only if my mouthwash isn’t doing its job.’
    We reach the letterbox that flags we’re only three blocks away from school. My hands begin to sweat and slide off the straps of my school bag. My stomach squirms. My tongue swells and grows bark. I stop and lean on the letterbox. The garage door slides down my forehead again, shuttering out light, air and sound.
    â€˜Not again!’ Elecktra squeezes her clutch under her armpit, grabs my hands and puts them on the letterbox under my chin. ‘Breathe,’ she instructs.
    I take a deep breath, but it strangles in my throat.
    â€˜Panic attacks just getting to school and you’re only in Year Seven. How are you going to deal with senior school?’ She rubs my back.
    I squint my eyes and wish to be invisible. If I was invisible, I could walk through Gate One with Elecktra and it would be like I was popular and beautiful.
    â€˜I don’t want to go. I look dumb.’
    â€˜You look like you.’
    â€˜That’s the problem,’ I squeak.
    Elecktra pushes her water bottle under my nose and I take a sip.
    â€˜Soft drink!’ I look at