What a Girl Wants Read Online Free

and staring at me with earnest hope.
    “No. No birthday celebrations. The gang went to Chili’s again. The waitress despises us, the Middle-earth battle will rage forever, and The Matrix is playing again tonight at Seth’s. Typical day.”
    “Oh, you! Why didn’t you go to Seth’s house? It sounds like fun, and you know you like him. I’ve seen the way you look at him.” Brea slides her sunglasses into her thick hair like a casual headband. Her green eyes stare into mine. “Admit it.”
    “Will you pass a note for me in homeroom?” I jump up and down, thoroughly enjoying my moment of humor.
    “Oh, Ash, it’s okay if you like someone, you know. Since when did you become so cynical?”
    After a long, quiet thought, the accusation brings the sting of tears to my eyes. “Cynical—that’s an ugly word. But it’s true. I don’t know what’s happening to me . . .” I pace back and forth in front of her, trying to work it out in my own head as well as explain it to her. Maybe she can help me see straight again, calm my topsy-turvy brain.
    “I’m struggling, Brea, and I don’t know why. I have everything I thought I wanted . . . but my life seems so empty. I wish I knew what to do next. I guess all my goals have been met and they haven’t been replaced with anything new.”
    She takes my hand in her overly-concerned way. I love Brea. “You don’t think a husband will change that, do you, Ash?”
    I shake my head. “I know it won’t. But it’s not just the Husband Hunt that haunts me. On the outside, I look like Miss Success, don’t I?” I place the shape of an L on my forehead with my fingers. “I thought I’d change the world. And here I am eating at a chain restaurant every Sunday with people who don’t truly care if I come. Or if I’m another year older.”
    “I think you’re just in a mood, Ashley. I’ve never known you to feel sorry for yourself. And the Reasons love you. Everyone loves you.”
    “Why shouldn’t I feel sorry for myself ? I just spent my birth-day Dutch treat at Chili’s.” I’m thinking Brea got a diamond tennis bracelet for her last birthday. That somebody made her a cake from scratch. Does she not see the dichotomy here?
    Brea doesn’t mean anything by it, of course. She doesn’t possess an evil bone in that size-four frame of hers. Brea’s whole face suddenly lights up. “I need to tell you something that will cheer you up,” she whispers.
    Just by the way she says it, I know. “You’re pregnant!”
    Her smile fades. “How’d you know?”
    I laugh. “Something about your glow, I suppose. That and the new minivan you bought after your honeymoon. It’s not like you haven’t been waiting for this very moment since I met you.”
    Brea smoothes her stomach. “Can you believe it’s finally happening though?”
    “No!” I squeal appropriately, pulling her into an embrace. “I’m so happy for you, Brea.” I fight the nausea as I stare past her perfect hair and into the empty parking lot. Pastor’s Wife Kelly and my best friend. Two preggers announcements in one day is a bit much for me to take. Lord, did you forget it’s my birthday? You said you wouldn’t give me more than I can handle, but com’on!
    I take a deep breath and compose an appropriate smile so I can let my best friend out of my death grip. Brea was created to be a mother. She has all those nesting instincts, like buying a minivan before children. Her constant mothering of me is testament to her abilities: taking me to church, rescuing me from a drunken high school party, and showing me that even though my parents didn’t seem to care, God did. I don’t know what I would have turned out to be without Brea and her young love of God. Perhaps a slightly high bus driver like my brother.
    Brea’s children will look like Baby Gap models. She will never dress her kids like nerds, and unlike my own mother, she innately understands the disaster of wearing floods in junior high school or the wrong