Pretend You Love Me Read Online Free Page A

VFW, next to the tanning salon.”
    “Tanning salon? What is it, like a chaise lounge under a lightbulb?”
    I smiled.
    She closed her eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I’m just—” She expelled a long breath.
    “It’s a real tanning salon,” I told her. “Well, there’s only the one tanning bed and my friend Jamie’s usually in it. But
     I can get you in for free.” Why’d I say that? It’d be taking advantage of Armie. Taking him up on his offer.
    “That’s okay,” Xanadu said. “I’m not into melanoma.”
    That was the truth. Her skin was white as summer clouds.
    “What’s your real name?” she asked.
    I felt as if someone had sucker-punched me. Why’d she have to ask? I didn’t want to say. I hated my name. On my eighteenth
     birthday, I was legally changing it.
    “Come on.” She pressed against me with her shoulder. “I won’t tell.”
    She had to know how funny
that
was. This was Coalton. Her elbow nudged mine and stayed touching. Why was she always touching me? Not that I didn’t like
     it; she was driving me crazy. I exhaled a long breath. “Mary-Elizabeth,” I mumbled. “If you ever call me that, I’ll kill you.”
     The moment I said it, I wished I could take it back. I’d never hurt her.
    She laughed. “You should have
my
name. Xanadu. How stupid. Call me Xana, by the way.”
    No, I didn’t think I would. She was Xanadu. Exotic, enchanted, poetic.
    “God,” she went on. “I wish my parents
were
crackheads or something; at least I’d have an excuse why they did this to me. To me and my sister both. Know what her name
     is?”
    I shook my head.
    “Babylon.”
    Did I snort?
    “Yeah.” She grinned. “So Mary-Elizabeth is, like, ordinary, normal.”
    Not to me. “I just don’t like it,” I said. “It isn’t me.”
    She met my eyes and nodded. “I get that. I so get that.” She held my attention. Vibes passed between us. Something. Intense.
     We both looked down. I saw her eyes skim my bicep, my forearm, settle on my hand. My filthy work glove. I pulled it off, along
     with the other, and stuffed them both in my back pocket. Xanadu’s gaze gravitated to my Timex. “Seven thirty-eight,” she said.
     “Let’s see, I’ve only been here three days, four hours, and thirty-eight minutes, and already I regret my decision to come.”
    My heart sank. I wanted her here. I needed her here.
    Looking off into the wheat fields, she added, “I just needed to get my head straight, you know? See if being away for a while
     would make things better. I was going to blow off the rest of the school year, but it’s so freaking boring out here, I figured
     I might as well go. Hook up with some people, maybe. I don’t know.”
    Hook up with me, I thought.
    “You’re probably wondering why I’m here, right?” She spread her hands out beside her and clutched the edge of the truck bed.
     She had delicate hands, girl hands.
    “Right,” I said. I didn’t really care why. Just stay.
    “My parents gave me an ultimatum. I could either exile myself at Aunt Faye and Uncle Lee’s in Kansas or enter this diversion
     program in Englewood. I’ve known a couple of people who did the program and they say it’s like a prison. Worse than a prison.
     You can’t leave your house at night or call your friends. I mean, what choice did I have?” She reached behind her with one
     hand and lifted her hair out of her shirt, letting it cascade over her shoulders.
    I had no idea what she was talking about. But I wanted her to keep talking, keep playing with her hair. “Where’s Englewood?”
     I asked.
    She blinked at me. “Denver. The suburbs. I mean, I understand where my parents are coming from. I was definitely headed for
     trouble. It wasn’t my fault, though, or even my choice. Okay, maybe it was my choice.” She glanced away. “
And
my fault. What choice do you have, though, when everyone does it? E, I mean. Or worse. And if they’re not doing drugs, they’re
     getting stoned.