Patience County War (Madeleine Toche Series) Read Online Free

and spare me the daily hours of seeing your sorry face in here licking it up drop by drop.”
    That had done it. There was a huge laugh around the lunch counter, Jack Wilson the loudest.
    When Sam had stopped laughing and shaking his head he said, “Potatoes would be great.”
    A few minutes later a mixing bowl of potatoes appeared in front of him, along with a pepper grinder and butter. Sam added the butter, some pepper and a healthy dose of Tabasco.
    Sheila came around the counter and slid in next to him.
    “Anything exciting today, Sammy?” she asked.
    “I have to go out to see Carl Koots, problem with his neighbor.”
    “Carl the chicken fucker?” Mike Vance, the school janitor, asked sitting two seats down the counter.
    “Now, there’s no proof he ever fucked a chicken,” Sam said earnestly. His little voice said “I can’t believe that I used the words chicken fucker” in a serious conversation.” There were a few things about rural living that fell into the absurd category. At least the lack of barnyard animals in big cities kept the practice of bestiality indoors.
    “Well, that’s not what I heard,” Vance stated resolutely as if that settled the discussion. Sam closed his eyes and shook his head like he was the only sane man in a community of crazies.
    “People, it’s 2001. Who cares whether a man has a thing for chickens or not? Maybe he’s a recluse who somebody decided years ago enjoyed all aspects of chicken husbandry, from courtship to mating to eating. Shouldn’t our town have everything a town needs? You know a doctor, a banker, a lawyer and the celebrated position of chicken fucker?” Sam said sarcastically.
    Sheila was pinching her leg and biting her lip to keep from laughing. She was shaking and her eyes were absolutely on fire. Sam looked at her and was instantly affected. There is nothing funnier than trying not to laugh with somebody else. Especially a pretty girl, he thought. They’d almost made it when somebody started crowing like a rooster. Sam and Sheila lost it together. Life was good.
    After breakfast and a cruise through town, Sam pulled onto a grown over gravel road and drove up to a small, well-kept log home. He noticed a large garden and a couple of chicken barns. He glanced into one and was turning to walk to the house when a voice said, “I bet you’re wondering if I think I can fuck them all.”
    An older man stepped up to Sam. He stood ram-rod straight, his face weathered from the outdoors. There was no old age stoop, only a balanced readiness to the man’s body. He was lean, and moved well for a man his age, but he was no spring chicken. Sam looked into Carl’s eyes and didn’t dare crack a smile.
    “No sir.” The look on the man’s face made Sam feel small. That’s when he noticed the American flag fluttering in the wind next to a small garden out back.
    “Sometimes I run around here without clothes on and once some clown in a delivery truck saw me carrying a chicken. Now if I was going to have relations with some animal it wouldn’t be a chicken. They’d just squawk about it.”
    The older man smiled and they both laughed.
    “Young man, I don’t give a damn what anyone thinks about me, except for a very few men. Now you look familiar.”
    “I’m Sam Trunce.”
    “John’s boy?”
    “Yes sir.”
    “He should have brought you around.”
    “Dad visits you?”
    “He better, I saved his ass in France. He talks about you though.”
    “Sorry, I didn’t realize that he knew you. He keeps quiet about the people he knew in the wars.”
    “Three wars, hard to believe, one was enough for me. There are few soldiers like John Trunce. Forty years airborne!” Carl said with pride. “Now, what can I do for you, Sheriff?”
    “Well, Mr. Koots, I understand there’s some kind of fence dispute, with your neighbor, Mr. Dupree.”
    “You mean the goat fondler?”
    “Well, I guess if people call you chicken fucker, you’re not going to like it