What falls away : a memoir Read Online Free
Author: 1945- Mia Farrow
Tags: Motion Picture Actors and Actresses, Farrow, Mia, 1945-
lungs.
Drawn by dreams, and some mysterious brew of talent, de-termmation, looks, and luck, our parents came from towns and cities across the United States and Europe too, to their positions in the Hollywood constellation. Once there, in that rarefied setting, it was easy to lose touch with origins, roots, people, perspective.
They couldn't know how their gifts had come to them, or how long they would endure. They worked and played, and fashioned their lives in dazzling light, while insecurity and apprehension curled into tight little balls, and burrowed deep into unacknowleged silence. But over the years, a creeping awareness of the precariousness of their place fed the dark, hidden things that grew, malignant, demanding light, pushing through the cracks in the smooth, polished surface . . .
R I loved my parents with a fierceness and an incomprehension that was terrifying.
My mother was born in 1911, above a draper's shop in the little town of Boyle, Roscommon, in the west of Ireland. Whatever magic is in her soul, she tells me, comes from there. Her own mother, Mary Frazer, was a beautiful and amusing woman, but not a happy one. She found marriage difficult, and never learned to cook or keep house. When her husband said he liked lamb, she bought a whole sheep and hung it over the bathtub, where it dripped blood for days.
My grandfather went off to fight in World War I, but returned in a few months, his right arm shattered. Doctors recommended amputation, but he refused, and fought all
his life to keep it. My grandmother couldn't face suffering, and nervous breakdown followed nervous breakdown.
My mother, her father's favorite, went to the Convent of the Sacred Heart in Roehampton. She hated it. They had to wear vests in the bath, and were told that "whistling on the stairs makes Our Lady cry." Vivien Leigh was in the same class, the only girl m the school, according to my mother, who had any sense of direction: from the age of eleven she knew she would be an actress. The others just wanted to be socially successful and travel the world. Vivien Leigh was voted "prettiest girl in the school," and when my mother came in second, she cried all day, unable to believe that anyone thought she was pretty.
Mom was indeed pretty and was "discovered," Hollywood-style, by the director Frank Borzage, who was in Ireland looking for an Irish colleen and a little boy to play in the movie Song o^ My Heart, starring the famous tenor John McCormack.
My mother describes it this way: "It was the last night of Horse Show week and I wanted to celebrate. I was invited out by a very attractive young bachelor from Trinity College. My mother thought I looked tired and told me not to go out, but I went anyway. There was a dance band. Frank Borzage was sitting at the next table with a group of people and they were watching me. I knew exactly who they were. Everybody knew. They were looking for a young girl for a part in the film. The most beautiful girl in Dublin, Grace McLaughlin, went for an interview. A lot of my friends had tried out, and been turned down or were working as extras. But I didn't. I didn't think I was good-looking enough. Actually, they had given up looking for an Irish girl and were going back the next week, havmg decided to use a Hollywood actress. Eventually my escort wanted to go home, but I had a feeling something was going to happen, and I said, 'No, let's stay and have one more dance.' That dance sealed my fate. When I came back to my table and
I
WHAT FALLS AWAY 17
sat down, the hcadwaiter brought over Frank Borzage's card, on the back of which was written, 'If you are interested in films, will you come to my office tomorrow at eleven?' Frank signed me for three pounds a week." In October 1929, eighteen-year-old Maureen O'SuUivan, with a six-month contract, set sail for Hollywood, accompanied by her mother.
Three years later, my mother was signed by MGM and began work on Tarzan, the Ape Man, the first of six
Drawn by dreams, and some mysterious brew of talent, de-termmation, looks, and luck, our parents came from towns and cities across the United States and Europe too, to their positions in the Hollywood constellation. Once there, in that rarefied setting, it was easy to lose touch with origins, roots, people, perspective.
They couldn't know how their gifts had come to them, or how long they would endure. They worked and played, and fashioned their lives in dazzling light, while insecurity and apprehension curled into tight little balls, and burrowed deep into unacknowleged silence. But over the years, a creeping awareness of the precariousness of their place fed the dark, hidden things that grew, malignant, demanding light, pushing through the cracks in the smooth, polished surface . . .
R I loved my parents with a fierceness and an incomprehension that was terrifying.
My mother was born in 1911, above a draper's shop in the little town of Boyle, Roscommon, in the west of Ireland. Whatever magic is in her soul, she tells me, comes from there. Her own mother, Mary Frazer, was a beautiful and amusing woman, but not a happy one. She found marriage difficult, and never learned to cook or keep house. When her husband said he liked lamb, she bought a whole sheep and hung it over the bathtub, where it dripped blood for days.
My grandfather went off to fight in World War I, but returned in a few months, his right arm shattered. Doctors recommended amputation, but he refused, and fought all
his life to keep it. My grandmother couldn't face suffering, and nervous breakdown followed nervous breakdown.
My mother, her father's favorite, went to the Convent of the Sacred Heart in Roehampton. She hated it. They had to wear vests in the bath, and were told that "whistling on the stairs makes Our Lady cry." Vivien Leigh was in the same class, the only girl m the school, according to my mother, who had any sense of direction: from the age of eleven she knew she would be an actress. The others just wanted to be socially successful and travel the world. Vivien Leigh was voted "prettiest girl in the school," and when my mother came in second, she cried all day, unable to believe that anyone thought she was pretty.
Mom was indeed pretty and was "discovered," Hollywood-style, by the director Frank Borzage, who was in Ireland looking for an Irish colleen and a little boy to play in the movie Song o^ My Heart, starring the famous tenor John McCormack.
My mother describes it this way: "It was the last night of Horse Show week and I wanted to celebrate. I was invited out by a very attractive young bachelor from Trinity College. My mother thought I looked tired and told me not to go out, but I went anyway. There was a dance band. Frank Borzage was sitting at the next table with a group of people and they were watching me. I knew exactly who they were. Everybody knew. They were looking for a young girl for a part in the film. The most beautiful girl in Dublin, Grace McLaughlin, went for an interview. A lot of my friends had tried out, and been turned down or were working as extras. But I didn't. I didn't think I was good-looking enough. Actually, they had given up looking for an Irish girl and were going back the next week, havmg decided to use a Hollywood actress. Eventually my escort wanted to go home, but I had a feeling something was going to happen, and I said, 'No, let's stay and have one more dance.' That dance sealed my fate. When I came back to my table and
I
WHAT FALLS AWAY 17
sat down, the hcadwaiter brought over Frank Borzage's card, on the back of which was written, 'If you are interested in films, will you come to my office tomorrow at eleven?' Frank signed me for three pounds a week." In October 1929, eighteen-year-old Maureen O'SuUivan, with a six-month contract, set sail for Hollywood, accompanied by her mother.
Three years later, my mother was signed by MGM and began work on Tarzan, the Ape Man, the first of six
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