leaned down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He was only being polite but it grated on my nerves. I didn’t even realize they knew each other.
“It was long. The rain made me have to drive extra slowly. I just want to relax and get something to eat.” She looked over at my lunch and scrunched up her nose. Uh, your daughter is lying over here in a hospital bed suffering from some kind of head trauma. I hated the way she tried to make everything about herself.
Ethan walked past her and up to me. “Any change?” he asked me hopefully.
“No.” His face fell and I felt a little guilty for not remembering what he obviously wanted me to. It still felt strange, but I felt more comfortable with Ethan than with my own mother. How screwed up is that?
“It’ll come.” He squeezed my hand and I looked down. I didn’t want to see the disappointment that I couldn’t do anything about.
“Ethan, what have you been up to?” my mother asked. I must have made some kind of face because he squeezed my hand again.
“I’m sorry,” he mouthed silently before he turned to my mother. “Work’s been busy and Juliet’s cookbook is coming along great.” He looked over at me.
I shook my head. Sorry, still don’t recall anything about it.
I wanted to ask him questions about us, about me, but I didn’t want to do that in front of Gloria. I was about to suggest she go down to the cafeteria when Carrie’s dad walked in.
“Juliet, how are you feeling? Dr. Turner filled me in on your problem.” He walked around to the other side of my bed so I turned my attention to him.
I didn’t know how to answer him. I was feeling lost. I was feeling scared. Did he want the truth? “Fine,” I lied.
He looked into my eyes. “You’re looking better than last night. Give it time.” My throat felt thick and my eyes started to tear up. Robert patted my hand and exchanged a look with Ethan, before turning to Gloria.
“Gloria, it’s a pleasure to see you again. I was going to have a cup of coffee, would you care to join me?” It was like Robert could read my mind.
“That would be great. I was just telling Ethan I could use a bite to eat.” She got up and grabbed her huge purse which was on the floor beside her. “I’ll be back in a little while, Juliet.”
I smiled and lifted my hand in a weak wave and she and Robert left the room.
“I’m sorry about that. I was so worried about you this morning that I felt I had to call her. She is your mother.”
“It’s okay; you couldn’t know how she would be.”
“Well, yes, I did, but I called her anyway.” He shook his head ruefully. “Maybe Dad will keep her busy.” He stood there in silence for a moment and I forced myself to speak.
“Can I ask you something?” He nodded. “Do I have a cat?”
“No.” He didn’t say anything else; he just looked at me like I had a head injury.
“Ethan, I need to ask you something else.” I gathered up my courage.
“Anything.”
“Do I love you?” He looked as if I slapped him.
“Yes.” It was barely a whisper. My throat constricted. I knew he would say that, but it seemed like it was physically hurting him.
I wanted to comfort him, and apologize for not loving him now, but I couldn’t say anything. I felt frozen. I was terrified. I swallowed around the lump in my throat.
“Yes, you love me, and I love you. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.” I could hear the conviction in his voice, so I knew that he was telling me the truth, but I wasn’t feeling it in my heart.
Chapter Three
Ethan left when my mother came back. I was conflicted. On the one hand I needed time to myself to come to terms with my situation to try to remember something. On the other hand, I felt like asking him to stay with me. Of course I didn’t because, in truth, I didn’t have much to say to him. I wanted to ask him