Uncertain Ground Read Online Free

been part Indian himself.
    Though Granny had forbidden Aunt Bertha to join the church, the rest of the family, both her brothers and her sister, seemed to ignore the Mcleans’ religion. Amazed at the strength of old prejudices, I remained curious. I could, I suppose, ask her how she felt about becoming a Catholic; however, I was too unsure about how she’d react, and I would never have waked up anybody to ask such a question. She was napping by now beneath a dried palm cross tacked on the wall above her headboard. Even if she were given to abrupt questions herself, she’dbe too upset over losing her nap to give a clear answer. I could imagine her rising up hollering, sitting straight up in bed, a plump middle-aged woman multiplied nine times by triple mirrors on each of the three dressers stationed around the room. Across from her bedstead was Uncle Mowrey’s.
    She slept happily surrounded by her nest of dressers, a chair, and a small daybed. Too small for me or for Emmett—unused except as a catchall for Bertha’s treasures—the daybed was covered with bits of frayed tapestry that might become pillow covers if she ever got around to making them, boxes of last year’s Christmas decorations, a clutter of costume jewelry, and an amber rosary that had been blessed by the pope.
    “It got broken anyway,” Bertha sighed, then laughed.
    The day we arrived, she led us to our part of the bedroom, a double-sized space since the sliding doors which would have ordinarily made two bedrooms had been pushed wide open.
    I saw then that she meant for Emmett and me to sleep on the twin beds straight across from hers and Uncle Mowrey’s.
    “We all need the draft.” Bertha pointed to the tall front and back windows, the only one without curtains in the house.
    “You want us both here?” I was so surprised I asked out loud. I’d expected a room of my own. Why couldn’t Emmett have slept on the couch downstairs? That was the way Kenyon and I had slept when we first visited. Now Emmett had to have the only other bed in the house, one next to mine separated by a narrow strip of rug and Bertha’s supposed supervision. Uncle Mowrey, slightly deaf already, wouldn’t have heard an approaching bomb, and he was, I thought, generally so unnoticing he wouldn’t see somebody tap dancing naked in front of him.
    “Well, Celia, after all, you are cousins.” She smiled as if she had said the most ordinary thing.
    Emmett grinned, hung a few things in the closet, and dumped this suitcase under the bed. He’d been living out of it mostly ever since. I’d emptied mine into one of the dressers and the closet. I wanted to slam the door when I finished, but Aunt Bertha was waiting on her side of the room so I didn’t. I was stillunhappy in that bedroom with Emmett. I had to make sure he wasn’t around or go to the bathroom to dress and undress. And when I walked out, I had to make sure I had enough clothes on. At home I could wander around in a slip or pajamas. Not here. At the first sight of my blue-flower-sprigged shortie pajamas Emmett had given me a mock leer, just enough of one to let me know he was watching. When I added a robe, he stood by his bed wearing only a pair of drawstring pajama bottoms and laughed. Despising being made to feel too prim, I pulled the robe off and got the leer once more. When I got into bed, I turned my back on him. A flush broke over my neck and down my shoulders as if I were standing under a warm shower. I rolled over and threw my pillow at him. He wouldn’t give it back.
    “I’ll have to ask Aunt Bertha for another one,” I whispered.
    He laughed and tossed it toward me as if he’d planned to all along, and for that moment, I wasn’t an equal. I was only about ten-years-old and at the mercy of a slightly indulgent, much older boy.
    I needed a place to be by myself, a room with a door I could shut. Kenyon and I had shared a bedroom until I was six. Since then, except for the semesters away, I’d had a