Trust (Chasing Shadows) Read Online Free

help myself to a bowl?”
    “It’s only 4:30, but sure...let’s eat.”
    It took me all of five minutes to wolf down the stew. Claire just stared at me as if I was possessed. Maybe I was. My obsession was getting through medical school. It consumed me the way I had devoured the dinner.
    “You’re leaving already, aren’t you?” she asked, the emotion gone from her voice.
    I just nodded.
     
    Remembering back to those days, I recalled endless classes during the day, followed by rotations at the hospital, and catching four to five hours sleep in between. My friends said it wasn’t my fault...the fact that I only had time for myself back then. Still, I was so wrapped up in school, that either I didn’t notice or I simply ignored the signs of a troubled girl. I couldn’t help but feel like the aftermath had been my fault.
    Maybe that’s why I pushed Ella into talking and opening up so quickly, even if that meant doing it on her terms...on the mountain. I was just so damned scared that it was happening again. Claire said I wasn’t there for her, that she felt there was no way to ever be happy. She rationalized that she’d be better off...
    I shook my head, trying to remove the memories along with the current fear that was building up in my gut. I kept thinking of how it could have been different for Ella, if only I had kept our sessions in the office. Sure, I wouldn’t know anything about her except the requisite background information. She wouldn’t have opened up about Nate. That only happened when we went hiking and her own memories came pouring back. Yeah, I know why I agreed to start these little hiking sessions... dates...whatever one wants to call them. I wanted to be near her. I wasn’t about to lose Ella like I lost Claire.
    When Ella landed herself in the hospital they called for my evaluation of her. In short, they wanted to know if she posed a risk to herself. All I could think of was that she  posed a significant risk to my heart with her waves of brown hair and matching eyes framed in dark lashes. Her personality was strong, even though her body had been through hell. She hadn’t eaten properly in weeks and a regular dose of sleeping pills hadn’t helped her anemia. But had she tried to kill herself like Claire? I couldn’t believe that this girl with the quick wit and sharp tongue would deny the rest of us her continued company. She was a fighter, even if she needed help to endure her loss.
    As I continued down the trail, I knew that I was facing the distinct possibility that even if my diagnosis had been wrong and she wasn’t just experiencing grief, I could lose her anyway and that propelled me onward and made me want to start running even though it was dark. I had to admit that this wasn’t just about helping a patient or ensuring that I didn’t repeat my mistakes of the past. There was a chemistry between us. I felt it and I’m pretty sure she did as well. I had to find her.
    And when I do, I’ll take back everything I said and did, and make her whole.
    I’ll be her physician and help her through this, even if it breaks my heart. She doesn’t need the hassle or confusion of anything more. I’m not even sure that I do.

Chapter 7 - Nate
     
     
    If I weren’t already dead, I’d joke that not being able to tune into Ella was killing me. She was harder to track than some of the enemies my Marine corps was sent to patrol. I couldn’t hear her thoughts and no matter how hard I tried to tune into her mind and connect the way we had been over the last month, all I heard was silence. It was an infuriating and frightening silence that was only punctuated by the occasional howl of a coyote.
    But she was out here and I was feeling all the more desperate to find her. I had no connection to Ethan because Ella hadn’t fully let him into her life, not that I was totally broken up about that. Yet, it meant that I couldn’t trace her through him either. The two of them were on their own and as far