To Say I Love You Read Online Free

another man was gay enough,” he grunted.
    “Sure is.” Then I reconsidered his words. “Are you asking me about sex? ’Cause if you are, that’s okay, but I’m not about to tell you unless you’re sure you wanna know.”
    “No,” he said, but I could tell he’d thought about it. “I don’t wanna know about that.”
    Good , I said silently. “A lot of parents wouldn’t be this cool with their only son being gay.”
    “To quote the great Bob Dylan, Jesse….”
    That made me laugh. “Yeah. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy things turned out like this, and not with you disowning me.”
    “Fuck’s sake,” he said. “You’re my kid, aren’t you? Will makes you happy, just like Trent makes Jen happy. I worry for you because you’re my son. I might not understand it all, but it doesn’t stop me loving you.”
    “Thanks, Dad.”
    That was the end of the conversation. He went back to his rod, I picked up my book, and the quiet settled around us again.

Chapter 3

     
    W ILL TEXTED me to say things were taking longer than he’d expected at work, and he wouldn’t be able to get back as quickly as he thought. It stung, knowing we would already have been apart for over a week by the time he came back, but it wasn’t like there was anything I could do about it. So I sucked it up, straightened my spine, and got on with life.
    It turned out keeping house for my family was a harder job than I’d anticipated. It wasn’t just Dad and Jen—I could handle them—it was all the aunts and cousins that came out of the woodwork and spent a few hours a day at the house. That meant constant tea, coffee, cookies, cake, pies…. Entertaining when I didn’t need or want to be entertained.
    Neither Jen nor I wanted to cook, Dad couldn’t cook, and I kept refusing offers from those concerned aunts and cousins who wanted to make dinner for us every night. Will was the cook in our house, and we ended up ordering in more than was advisable. We didn’t particularly want to go out, either. If it had been up to me, I’d have lived on sandwiches and iced tea, and I guessed Dad and Jennifer were the same.
    The three of us didn’t really socialize in the evenings, either. When I did sit in the family room, it always felt supremely awkward. Two men at opposite ends of the room, neither talking to the other, eyes glued on the TV for the duration of the show until I went to bed early to read, leaving him to whatever he wanted to do.
    “Why are you here, Jess?” Dad asked in a commercial break, shattering the silence. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, but your Mama’s funeral was weeks ago now.”
    I shifted in the recliner to look at him. “Do you want me to go?”
    “That wasn’t what I asked.”
    “I don’t know,” I said, trying to hold back the frustration in my voice. “It just feels like I should be here right now.”
    “Me and your sister… well, you know Jen. She’ll be fine. And I’m all right too. You’ve got a whole life up in Seattle. I don’t like to think you’re missing out on anything.”
    “I’m not missing out,” I said. “I promise. I want to be here. I can’t tell you all the reasons why. I’m not ready to go back and… and….”
    “For it all to be real? She’s not coming back, no matter how much you or I wish she were.”
    “I know that. I’m not a child, Dad.”
    He smiled, the edges of his mouth tugging up though he tried to hide it.
    “You don’t know how many times I’ve heard you say that. I know you’re not a child. Neither me or Jennifer is your responsibility, though.”
    “Do you mind?” I asked. “Me being here?”
    “I love that you’re here. I wish the circumstances were better, sure. I like that we get to hang out.”
    It was my turn to smile. “Hang out?”
    “All the cool kids are saying it.”
    I laughed. “So, you’re not going to send me packing?”
    “Of course not. No. Take your time.”
    The conversation made me think, something I’d