Throwing Love #5 (The Throwing Love Romance Series - Book #5) Read Online Free

mind for two days, unsure of
what to do with myself. I had so much to think about since my talk with Connie
and I still had no idea what to do. I was truly lost. I knew what I wanted, but
what I wanted didn't really seem to matter anymore. I loved Bennett and I
obviously wanted to be with him, I knew that much for sure. But I also knew
that I couldn't live the way we were living in our relationship, it was too
hard for me. I needed to feel important. I needed to feel like my boyfriend
appreciated me in his life and wanted me there. That he actually wanted me to
be a part of his life. I just didn't get that feeling with Bennett in our
current situation, whether he meant to portray himself that way or not. So how
could I possibly accept being with him if that's the way things were always
going to be? I shouldn't have to sit by the phone waiting for Bennett to
finally decide that he had time for me. It wasn't right, and I wasn't going to
have any part of it. I wanted to be with Bennett, but he would need to give
back if he wanted to be in my life. That was what he needed to prove to me, but
currently, he didn't seem to be interested in doing anything to save us.
    I had been surprised when Bennett started calling me after
our fight. I had assumed he had made his own decision about the relationship
when he walked out of his apartment that day. I had no idea what he wanted or
what he had to say, but I didn't want to talk to him until I had made a
decision about the kinds of things I wanted in my life. That way, when I heard
what Bennett had to say about things, I would have a clear idea of whether or
not I wanted to be with him anymore. I had no idea what he was going to say. He
could be calling to apologize for his behavior and beg me to take him back or
he could just be calling to ask if we could remain on good terms just in case
he ended up on my father’s team. I would not like that part of the conversation
at all, but it was just as likely to happen as the other scenario. I wasn't
sure what I was willing to sacrifice in order to get what I wanted. Bennett
wasn't willing to sacrifice anything to be with me and that was a real problem
for me. Why should I be the only one sacrificing in a relationship? It wasn't
the way things worked at all. We both needed to do some sacrificing if things
were going to work between us.
    Every time I thought about Bennett and all the memories I
had with him, I knew I wanted him more than anything. We always had such a good
time together, there was no denying it, and the chemistry between us was
insane. There was no doubt about it; we had a great connection that I imagined
would always get us through the bad times in life. The only problem was it
currently wasn't helping us out at all. Bennett was hung-up on doing whatever
he had to in order to get to the major leagues and I just seemed to be in the
way. I didn't want to ever feel like my boyfriend thought I was holding him
back. That wasn't love to me. If he couldn't make time for me, then how could
we possibly have any type of real relationship? We couldn't, plain and simple.
    I didn't think that I could deal with all the extra
practices; especially if there was a chance he was going to cancel plans with
me and leave again. I couldn't go through that over and over again. Especially
since Bennett hadn't made even one sacrifice for me. Bennett had a need to
always do what the coaches said now, and I didn't like it one bit. I had been in
the industry for years and his commitment lately was a little overboard. He had
certain expectations in the game, but for someone with his talent, it was very
unnecessary for him to be practicing as much as he did.
    His dedication to the game at that point was so strong that
I was starting to get jealous. Which was absurd. I had dated players before and
it had never got to this point of an obsession. I could almost strangle my
father for getting involved because I felt like he was to blame for the fact
that Bennett