The World's Awesomest Air-Barf Read Online Free Page A

water.
    The sun dropped lower in the sky. The light began to fade. The mood of the people gathered around the tree was sombre and tense. They all stood gazing up anxiously at Danny as he crawled to the
tip of the final branch.

    He dropped the last caterpillar into his bucket.
    ‘Finished!’ he called hoarsely, and carried on whistling.
    The roar from the throng of people watching Danny echoed around the square. It was as though Real Marisco had won the Cup!
    Father Ignatius put his hands together and offered a silent prayer of thanks.
    Danny began to pick his way slowly and painfully back down through the branches, but then stopped. His limbs and lips, tight and tense all day from climbing, gripping and whistling, had finally
given up. Danny’s body and mouth locked tight with cramp.
    He couldn’t move a muscle.
    He couldn’t say a word.
    He was stuck.
    He heard someone below shout, ‘Help him!’
    Then he heard Sally Butterworth yell, ‘I’ll save you, Danny!’
    Sally raced from the crowd and scurried up the ladder. In seconds she had clambered into the tree and reached the branch where Danny was perched. She smiled at him.
    ‘Your lips are stuck in kissing position,’ she said.
    No! thought Danny. Help!
    But there was no one to help. Sally leaned forward and planted her lips firmly on Danny’s.
    ‘Awwwwww,’ cooed the crowd.

    Urrrrrrgh! thought Danny.
    He looked past Sally into the crowded square and spotted his sister Natalie laughing at him. Even worse, his mum had finally fixed the video camera and was filming the kiss.

    He could hear Natalie singing, ‘Danny and Sally, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.’
    The kiss went on . . .
    Urrrrrrrrrrgh!
    and on . . .
    Urrrrrrrrrrrrgh!
    and on . . .
    Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!
    and on . . .
    Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!
     
    Danny sent up his own silent prayer. Help!
    And his prayer was answered.
    He heard leaves rustling and a branch creaking, and there was Matthew, beside them in the tree.
    ‘Now that’s enough of that!’ ordered Matthew. He tried to drag Sally away, but she clung on tight.
    ‘Sally,’ he shouted. ‘There’s a massive spider on your back!’
    Danny saw Sally’s eyes widen in horror. She pulled away quickly.
    ‘Arrrrrrrrrrgh!’ she screamed. ‘Get it off! Get it off!’
    Matthew pretended to brush something off her. He blew out his cheeks and shook his head. ‘Wow, that was huge ,’ he gasped. He wiggled his fingers. ‘It had really hairy legs! There must be loads more of them around here.’

    Sally screamed. In seconds she was out of the tree and standing in the square next to her mother.
    Matthew grinned. ‘I think Silly Butterworm has just broken the world record for the Fastest Climbing Out of a Tree to Escape an Invisible Spider, don’t you?’
    Danny looked at Matthew and raised his eyebrows, which was the only part of him he could move. Thanks, Matt, he thought. You saved me.
    ‘I’m sorry, Dan,’ said Matthew.
    Danny twitched his eyebrows once. So am I, Matt, he thought.
    Matthew understood and nodded. ‘We will never, ever fall out, ever again.’
    Danny raised his eyebrows twice: No.
    ‘Do you see what happens when I’m not around to look out for you?’
    Danny twitched his eyebrows once: Yeah.
    The two boys perched side by side in the tree, and looked down on the people celebrating in the town square. After a while, Matthew sighed.
    ‘Have you realized that when your dad gets the job as manager of Real Marisco, you’ll have to live here and I’ll have to go back to England?’ he said.
    Danny frowned: What?
    Matthew stared at Danny sadly.
    ‘We’ll probably never see each other again,’ he said quietly. ‘Ever.’
    Danny’s eyebrows nearly twitched off his face: Noooooooooooooo!
     
Danny Baker – Record Breaker
    Hotel La Langosta
    Marisco
    Spain
    Dear Mr Bibby,
    I dressed up as El Periquito and collected 14,975 caterpillars. I didn’t know it at the time, but as I passed the buckets down to
Father Ignatius,