not sleeping so well, waking with the same bloody nightmare but I have kept busy. I managed to repair the damage to the walls the security guy made and buy a basic working wardrobe of clothes. Today is Saturday I have a lunch arranged with Sofia, her mum Vivienne and her Aunt Marie which is a much needed distraction. Vivienne has booked a corner table at the Windows restaurant on the twenty eighth floor of the Hilton on the corner of Hyde Park. The clear sky means there is an uninterrupted one eighty degree view of West London and a perfect view of Daniels apartment building opposite the park. So, despite the stunning view I only have eyes for the light and airy interior. The restaurant is surrounded by floor to ceiling glass and there is a slightly raised mezzanine which means that everyone seated will have some view over the city. The cocktail bar next to the restaurant, Sofia explains is very lively at the weekend and has the most spectacular view as the sun sets and London lights up. I don’t need to go to the cocktail bar for that. I have witnessed that spectacle on many occasions, mostly with Daniels arms wrapped around my waist.
I take a sip of the chilled pink champagne and gaze again around the room, trying to quell the rising sadness and search for another distraction. There is an impressive piece of artwork in the shape of an intertwined piece of ribbon made from rippling steel. It stretches the length of the centre of the room and hangs above the tables, reflecting the light on every bend and curve of the shiny material. There is loud laughter from a large group of people on the end table, perhaps fifteen family members celebrating. I find I can happily tune out from the memories of that view and from our own tables conversation. That is until Marie asks me outright why I don’t just settle down with Marco. It wasn’t just the pungent smell of the ham hock and pea volute that has me stuffing a napkin in my mouth to prevent the sudden rush of vomit. Luckily Sofia intercedes on my behalf.
“Ew gross Aunt Marie and just as likely as me hooking up with Marco.” With a disgruntled look on her face she pushes her plate far away as if the idea has put a stop to her appetite as well as mine. Vivienne tactfully changes the subject.
“I think we will need another fitting for you Bets you look like you’ve lost some weight.” Her sweet smile and intent kind eyes causes my nose to prickle sharply and I sniff back the instant onset of tears. I quickly reach for my water to give my body something to do other than cry. Sofia gasps, as if seeing me for the first time.
“Shit!” Sofia’s mouth drops open.
“Sofia language.” Embarrassed, Vivienne reprimands her daughter.
“Sorry Mama but God I didn’t even notice. Bets are you eating at all at the moment? The dress is going to hang off you like a stick in a sack and that is not how it is supposed to look.” She grumbles and I don’t know whether she is more concerned for me or the dress. “Are you ok? Maybe come and stay with us for a while, Mama can feed you back up?” She holds my hand and threads her fingers through and I know she’s not so worried about the dress.
“I’m good, really, just been off my food a little. A persistent stomach bug but it’s still four weeks to go and I’m sure I can pack on the pounds in no time.” I grab another bread roll and see both the women relax.
“Maybe just have a fitting a few days before the big day just in case. Sofia is right, the dress really does need to be fitted.” Vivienne offers and Sofia agrees with an enthusiastic nod. I make a break for the ladies just as coffee and petit fours are being served with homemade marshmallow that looks amazing. Sofia is quick to follow. She grabs my elbow and manoeuvres me to sit on the silk covered high backed chair in the powder room, drawing her own chair directly in front of me. Her fixed intense chocolate eyes laced with query and concern. Shit!
“So it’s