The Letting Read Online Free

faint moonlight, I can see her blonde hair shining. She is beautiful, and at sixteen, she is so very delicate, like a tiny ghost-girl with pale skin and deep violet rings under her large blue eyes. With her petite frame and soft voice, she doesn’t look or sound much older than the girls in cabin O. I think even if Gretchen was well and had been able to attend Lettings, they still would have kept her here at camp, rather than sending her directly to the New World. The girls are supposed to feel comfortable and bond with her because she looks like one of them. But for the most part, I haven’t seen that happen. I think it’s because poor Gretchen always seems worried, and it frightens the girls. I’ve just never ascertained what she’s worried about.
    Through the darkness, our cabin magically appears before us. It’s still many yards away, but there’s no light on, which means Margaret isn’t there, yet. Margaret is terrified of the dark. I can’t even imagine how hard it must be for her here in the woods at night.
    Gretchen and I let out a sigh at the same time. Without a word, I switch on the lamp in the corner and the fan in the window, and Gretchen and I make our way to our cots. We each sit, Gretchen, ladylike, on the edge of the cot, legs crossed at her ankles; me, cross-legged in the middle of my bed. We sit in silence for a few moments listening to each other breathe.
    “Oh, all right,” I say finally, uncrossing my legs and standing. “Whatever it’s going to be, worrying won’t help.”
    “I know.” Gretchen looks at me, and through the dim light, I can see the tears welling in her eyes.
    “What’s wrong?” I ask.
    “Oh Ronnie.” Gretchen falls forward, burying her face in her pillow. She lifts her head to speak. “It’s so selfish of me…but I can’t help but think they’re going to send you on to the New World. And what will I do here without you?”
    The New World? The words sit heavily in the room. Of course, we talk about the New World nearly every day, but it’s always with the campers. Never each other. The thought of one of us heading to the New World…well, we always hoped we would someday. But now? Have I served my time? It’s almost too much to imagine. What will the New World be like? I mean, really like? I’m too old to believe in candy trees and toys, so what will be waiting for me? Then I let myself think the thought I try never to think. Will my mother be there, waiting for me? Or has she forgotten all about me?
    My thoughts are interrupted by Gretchen’s small hand squeezing mine. “Ron? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. Who knows what’s really going on? It could be some change in protocol, or something.”
    I nod and we are startled by a knock on the door. Neither Gretchen nor I move. Neither of us speaks. We sit there, the silence palpable. The knock comes again, louder this time. The door rattles.
    “Ronnie?” Gretchen whispers. I nod my head and cross to the door.
    I pull the door open as if I’m yanking off a plastic bandage. The action startles Margaret who steps back as soon as she sees me. I have to admit I enjoy the moment of power over her. Although she is only one year older than me, at eighteen, Margaret runs the camp. Of course, she has orders and superiors, but I’ve never met them. Here, at this camp deep in the woods, Margaret is the law. And unfortunately, the law doesn’t much like me. I never really understood why. Margaret pulls herself together, visibly smoothing her shirt over her waistline. With long sleeves and long pants, she must be sweltering. She looks up at me. “May I come in?” she asks.
    I step aside to let her pass.
    Once she is inside the cabin, I see the eagerness in her eyes. Her eyes are a muddy green, and she is so happy about something, she is nearly giddy. She looks around for a place to sit but there isn’t one. And neither Gretchen nor I are going to offer up a cot, that’s for sure.
    “Oh out with it,