The Iron Stallions Read Online Free Page B

Hence “The Clutchers”, to which was added “The Widowmakers”, because we’d made quite a few of those in the Peninsula.’ Morby-Smith paused. ‘There is also another name – “The Pot Carriers” – which we earned by announcing after Salamanca that we had captured Marshal Marmont’s treasure wagon. We don’t often use this name, however, because the “treasure wagon” turned out to be a private commode, and a chamberpot is hardly the sort of thing you wear on your drum cloths.’
    It raised a polite chuckle, as it always did, and Josh almost laughed out loud. His grandfather had first spoken these words as a squadron officer in the Eighteen-seventies and they had become legendary.
    ‘We are one of the only two regiments in the army to share a number,’ Morby-Smith continued.’ The 19th Hussars and the 19th Lancers. It sprang from the mistake of a Whitehall clerk and has now become tradition, and because tradition is important in the army it has never been changed.’ He touched his cap. ‘Under the motto on your lance-caps you will see the words, Aut primus aut nullus . That’s Latin and it doesn’t mean “Out with the primus or there’ll be no tea” but The best or nothing . The 2nd Dragoons, the Greys, have the motto, Nulli Secundus , which means Second to None , but of course they’re second to us. And don’t believe it if anybody tells you we’re a junior cavalry regiment. We were first formed in 1642 but, due to the carelessness of someone who allowed us to be disbanded, were a little late in the field when we were reformed in 1760 by Joshua Goff.’
    Josh listened avidly. He had drunk all this in ever since he’d been able to understand what it was all about. It was nonsense, but it mattered because a soldier’s loyalty lay not with the King or the army but with his regiment, and because of that he had to know it as well as he knew his own family.
    ‘It has been said,’ Morby-Smith continued, ‘that the cavalry exists to look pretty in peacetime and get killed in war. That’s because we’re expected to look better on parade than anyone else but in wartime we’re always the first to bump into the enemy and the last to withdraw. Sometimes we’re called on to charge, though what exactly we charge with , these days nobody seems very sure, because at the moment horses appear to be a little de trop .’
    ‘How about tanks, sir?’ Josh suggested quietly.
    ‘Quiet, that man,’ the sergeant snapped.
    Morby-Smith’s eyebrows had lifted. ‘There seems to be someone in our midst who’s studied tactics,’ he said. ‘And perhaps he’ll prove to be right. In the meantime, however, we learn to ride horses. Before that great day arrives, however, you will learn to conduct yourselves like soldiers and to remember that cleanliness is next to Godliness, which here means bright buttons and shining souls.’
    To Josh, as he marched away, it had been a very satisfying introduction to army life. It was almost as if he’d been listening to his grandfather.
     
    As they crammed for haircuts into a hut where a barber was working at full speed, they were hailed with shouts.
    ‘Siddown, siddown, siddown! Don’t block up the bleedin’ gangway!’ The barber pushed away the man he had been shearing, his head like a wire brush. ‘Next!’
    Josh took his place.
    ‘Fancy a massage?’ the barber said.
    Josh grinned. He’d even heard all this before.
    ‘I’ll just have a nice shampoo.’
    ‘Well, go and stick your ’ead under the tap. Next.’
    ‘God,’ Orne said as they emerged, draughty about the cars. ‘They ought to give you gas with haircuts like these.’
    Their teeth were inspected, their eyes were tested and they were jabbed with needles, at which more than one giant went down like a felled tree. Under the showers, the new recruits were surprisingly modest, though Josh, who had grown used to public nakedness at school, was unworried. They were issued with Bedford cord breeches, SD