The Hireling Read Online Free Page A

anyone you were fond of ever died suddenly?’
    As a soldier Leadbitter had seen so many instances of sudden death that he had quite lost count of them. Neither to the idea nor to the fact could he respond emotionally. But he made the imaginative effort of remembering what he had felt like the first time. The young, raw Leadbitter had been sick, yes, physically sick. Wondering at this lost self, which seemed to have no connexion with the man he had become, he said:
    ‘It can give you a nasty turn, I do know that.’
    The moment he had said this Lady Franklin looked happier.
    ‘Yes, indeed,’ she said, ‘a nasty turn - how right you are. But for myself I don’t think I should mind - do you think you would? - sudden death, I mean.’
    ‘Not particularly, no, not particularly. Any time really -perhaps not just now.’
    Lady Franklin smiled.
    ‘No, not just now. Perhaps we should always find ourselves saying, “not just now”. And someone might be sorry about us - about you, I’m sure they would.’
    Leadbitter said nothing.
    ‘But it isn’t only that,’ continued Lady Franklin. ‘I could have got over that - the shock and so on. But you see it broke off something, in the way a tune is sometimes broken off. It was the tune of our lives, I suppose. We were singing it and listening to it at the same time: I’m sure you will understand that. But the meaning hadn’t revealed itself - it couldn’t, unless we each told the other what we thought it meant. He had told me something. He knew how ill he was but I didn’t: he had asked the doctor not to tell me. It must have made it worse for him, not being able to tell me. I knew he had to be careful, of course: but I saw years of happiness ahead. I minded many other things at the time: but what I still mind most is the curtain coming down so suddenly, leaving it all unfinished and meaningless. If there had just been a closing phrase, however painful - well, I could have borne it better. A word could have been enough, the one word “darling” recognizing what we had been to each other, summing it all up! If only I could have suffered in his presence, instead of when he was gone! We had done everything together, but we never suffered together - except during his attacks, and he had always got better! I never met him on the plane of our deepest feelings, not in the shadow of eternity. Or have I put it too dramatically?’
    ‘Not at all, my lady,’ Leadbitter answered. Truth to tell, he had not taken in all that Lady Franklin had been saying. He had withdrawn his attention and listened with half an ear, as he sometimes listened to the wireless. But the wireless made more sense: if only she would let him turn it on!
    Her last words lingered in his mind. The shadow of eternity! Rich people, who could afford to cultivate their emotions, talked like that. To him the shadow of eternity, in her context, meant the disposal, according to the regulations, of an inconvenient body which, from one moment to another, had ceased to be of interest to anyone - as his would be, if a few more of these lady-drivers drove the way they did.
    But now Lady Franklin was leading off again.
    ‘I still don’t know what I should have said to him,’ she said. ‘I ought to, oughtn’t I? I’ve had two years to think about it in! And I want to say it as much as ever I did. I know the shape and the colour of the words, and I know what I should have felt like, if I’d said them: it’s something I shall never feel now. If I could believe that he could hear, I could find them and say them now, I think. I don’t believe the dead can hear, do you?’
    ‘I expect it’s better for them not to, in many cases,’ Leadbitter said.
    Lady Franklin laughed and said: ‘No doubt you’re right.’ Then her face saddened again. ‘But speaking seriously,’ she said, ‘and I hope you don’t mind - it’s that undelivered message that torments me. He didn’t know what I felt for him. He died without