The Grace In Darkness Read Online Free Page A

until I learned how not to miss him so much.
    “ Are you okay? ” Pierce asked, touching my arm.
    I shook myself from my thoughts and forced a smile. “ I ’ m fine. ”
    I wasn ’ t. I was actually far from fine, but no one else needed to know that. Minutes later, Mak came bouncing through my room with a pizza and pizza boy ’ s number.
    “ I thought we were eating Chinese? ” I asked, confused.
    “ It ’ s all about variety, A. It ’ s what makes the world go ‘ round. ”
    “ You stole someone ’ s pizza, didn ’ t you? ”
    “ I didn ’ t steal anything. He gave it to me. ” She insisted. “ And I gave him my phone number. ”
    Peirce and I laughed. It was easy to be distracted by the two of them.
    We ate and then I helped Peirce put together the tree while Mak unwrapped the silver and red ornaments. For the next hour, we decorated the tree while Mak entertained us with childhood Christmas stories.
    I loved hearing about her family and her brothers and sisters. It took my mind off things, but not completely. Never fully completely. And as I sat there listening to Pierce and Mak trade old family war stories, my thoughts remained with Ryland.

 
     

     
    W alking up to the door, I took a deep breath, and lifted my hand to knock. Every second that I ’ d been away from Araya came crashing down on me like a cold shower of reality. I had attempted this once already, and I ’ d found that she was happier than I thought she would be. What if I ’ d waited too long to come back for her?
    Just the thought was enough to bring me to my knees, so I pushed it away and took a deep, nauseating breath and knocked hard on the door. I ’ d been able to hear the music on the other side, and I listened now as it faded into nothing.
    I took a step back when the door was flung open with way too much force to match the person on the other side. A small brunette stood in the doorway, with flushed cheeks and her hair in a high ponytail. She was out of breath like she ’ d been belting it out with the radio or dancing or maybe both.
    She held the door with one hand and leaned her body into the edge of it. She was wearing a tank top that hung mid-thigh, and I didn ’ t linger long enough to see if she wore anything underneath. Her hot-pink fuzzy slippers were my safety zone. She smacked loudly on a piece of red licorice and eyeballed me curiously.
    “ Can I help you? ” she asked, amused.
    I did a double take on the room number before clearing my throat. I was surprised by a couple of things: the fact that she could see me for one, and two, that she wasn ’ t Araya. I opened my mouth to speak, but I ’ d taken too long and missed my chance because she was talking again.
    “ Yes, ” was all she said and then she smiled like she ’ d just learned a secret.
    “ Huh? ” I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling like I ’ d missed something important.
    “ Yes, I ’ ll go out with you.. That is why you ’ re here, right? ” Again, her smile was all-knowing.
    “ Why do you assume everyone who knocks on our door is here to ask you out? ”
    The brunette ’ s smile widened as she watched me, but I was no longer interested in figuring her out. I heard her voice float in from the background, and my heart skipped as I tried to look around the brunette.
    She was standing in the back of the room with her back to me. She wore the same high ponytail as the brunette. Her shirt was designed to be wide around the shoulders and it hung off one and flared around her middle. Her jean shorts were faded and frayed around the edges. I followed the curves of her long legs down to her bare feet.
    She hadn ’ t even turned around yet and she already looked so much different. She was curvier, leaner. Her hair was longer and darker. She even sounded different— happier, settled—and that made my nerves knot. I wanted to walk up to her and spin her around, and then I would decide if I wanted to kiss her first or pick her up and take her