The Fright of the Iguana Read Online Free

to appear.
    Rather like the folded face of a cute Shar-pei. A missing Shar-pei . . .
    Back to reality, Kendra.
    “Tallulah gave Jasper a deathbed gift—hers, not his, only she didn’t die either, which is a good thing,” Angelica continued. “I like the woman, too, but right now I could strangle her. Figuratively, of course. When it turned out the chemo worked and she would live after all, she wanted Whiskey back. But Whiskey’s ours. We love Whiskey. Whiskey loves us . We couldn’t give Whiskey back.”
    They couldn’t return a bottle—even a case—of hard liquor? And they were having a love affair with the stuff?
    Before I could inquire further, Jasper continued with a huge and happy smile, “We traveled cross-country with him. Showed him a few times—he’s a show dog, you know? Fell in love with doing dog shows, all thanks to Whiskey. And Tallulah, of course. Whiskey won twice, best in class of all the weimaraners, and we toasted Tallulah both times with champagne.”
    Aha! Whiskey was a weimaraner. Even so . . . “While Tallulah was on her deathbed?” I asked, thinking that sounded as ghoulish as all get-out.
    “I don’t do well at funerals,” Angelica said, fanning herself with plump fingers.
    “And she was a whole lot better when we returned,” Jasper said. “We were so happy. We thought she’d be thrilled, too.”
    “Until she demanded Whiskey back. But we’d invested too much into that wonderful dog.” Angelica shook her head. “Tallulah didn’t put any conditions on her gift when she signed Whiskey’s pedigree papers over to us. But now she’s suing us.”
    “I hate this,” Jasper said. “I’d do almost anything to keep peace in the family. There aren’t many of us left, you know. But Whiskey’s part of our immediate family now. We can’t give him back.”
    “We understand,” Borden slipped in smoothly. “And we’re here to help.” He looked expectantly at me, as if he anticipated I’d sweep a duplicate Whiskey out from under the table and hand her over to them.
    Fat chance.
    But I did have some ideas. I was a great proponent of ADR, which meant Alternate Dispute Resolution.
    Of course in my complementary career, it also meant Animal Dispute Resolution, and I was an absolute expert in that.
    But right now I needed to end this session so I could get off to my anticipated lunch with Tracy. “Let’s set up a meeting with Tallulah and her attorney,” I said. “Maybe we can negotiate a win-win solution, even if you don’t give Whiskey back.”
    “We’ve talked to her a lot,” Jasper said dubiously.
    “Sometimes things work better with lawyers involved and legal fees adding up,” I said honestly, which earned a small warning scowl from Borden, followed by a smile.
    “Nothing like trying to stick it to the lawyers instead of each other to get to a settlement,” he said.
    They left it to me to call Tallulah’s counsel and set up a mutual meeting.
    And then, at long last, it was time for lunch.
     
     
    SINCE TRACY’S PET-SITTING realm was in L.A.’s west side and mine was in the San Fernando Valley, we decided to meet in neutral territory in between, at a deli in a small shopping center near the highest part of Beverly Glen.
    “You look half-naked somehow,” I said to my new friend as we joined up at the doorway, eye-to-eye since we were of similar height—five-five. Her eyes were light brown, and they immediately seemed startled until I added, “No Phoebe?” That was her adorable puggle, who she seemed to take everywhere.
    “I could say the same,” she retorted. “Where’s Lexie?”
    “Having a blast at Darryl’s day resort,” I said with a sigh, missing my pup, as always, when she wasn’t with me.
    “Phoebe’s with Allen,” she said. “He has the day off and they’re bonding.” Allen was Tracy’s significant other, an insurance salesman or something of that ilk. Not exactly my type, but he seemed stable and was certainly devoted.
    We chose a table