The Cost of All Things Read Online Free Page B

for me and Markos, it’s never really a decision. I always have his back and he has mine. “Ari’s telling the truth.”
    Brian stared at us for a moment, then pivoted on his heel and stomped down the hall.
    When he was out of sight, Markos grinned. “That was fun.”
    Ari punched him in the shoulder. “You idiot. I just lied to a cop.”
    “He wanted to believe you. That way I’m not such a failure.” Markos saluted and stood up from leaning on the locker, straightening his suit jacket. “Have a fantastic rest of your evening, lovebirds.”
    “Where are you going?” I asked.
    “Oh, I never lie to my family.”
    From behind us I heard a giggle—Serena Simonsen waved from the doorway of a dark classroom, and Markos waved back. Ari rolled her eyes, and as Markos passed me, he put a hand on my shoulder and leaned in. “She’s all right. You can keep her around,” he muttered into my ear, as if it was his decision (or even mine) whether or not Ari stayed with me.
    I grabbed his arm before he could walk away. “She might not agree.” She might not really want me. Average me. Impostor me.
    “Are you kidding me? She’s all in. Get your head out of your ass and look at her.”
    Ari and I watched Markos and Serena disappear into the empty classroom, then we headed back the way we came. As we walked I did what Markos said and I looked at her. Not the idea of her. Not the Ari who wore toe shoes and floated onstage. Not the one whose parents died when she was little. The girl in front of me. Leaning toward me. Looking right back at me.
    As soon as we stepped back into the gym, our arms were around each other. Soapy water still sputtered from the vents in the ceiling. Ari’s dress was so slippery and the floor so slick I had to hold her as tight as I wanted to or I’d lose her and we’d fall. My hands met at the small of her back. She held me just as tight—her hands linked at the back of my neck, twisted in my hair, her cheek pressed close against my collarbone—and I could feel her heart beating through the fabric of my secondhand suit.
    Anyone upset by their ruined clothes and hair had long since left, but a fair number of us had stayed. Someone had cut the lights, probably afraid of electrocution, so it was dark in the gym except for the glow of people’s cell phones flashing off the sparkle of dresses. It smelled like a laundromat, and since the DJ had long since given up, we could hear people laughing and splashing and attempting to dance to a small portable speaker someone had plugged into their phone. It was only a matter of time before Brian or some other authority figure came by and kicked us out, so we seized the moment.
    Ari relaxed into me. All effort left her. We melted together.
    “You saved Markos’s ass,” I said to her.
    “Brian’s too harsh on him.”
    “I didn’t even think you liked him. Markos, I mean.”
    She sighed deeper into my arms. Her hair was wet and flattened, half her makeup had run down her face and was now being rubbed onto me, and her dress had gone shapeless and bedraggled. But she was the most beautiful I’d ever seen her when she raised her head just enough to whisper in my ear.
    “Not as much as I like you.”
    Her soapy skin so close to mine. Her arms holding me and holding me up. She shook slightly, maybe a shiver. She wasn’t stone and marble; she wasn’t perfect and remote. She was here, in front of me. Choosing me.
    “I love you,” I said.
    She looked at me, eyes bright. She wasn’t surprised, I noted with relief. “I love you, too.”
    We swayed back and forth. Dancing. In the dark and wet, the two of us together.
    It’s my favorite memory of Ari out of a thousand memories. It’s the one I keep on hand, the talisman. That was the girl I loved.

5
ARI
    Everyone kept telling me how much I loved Win. Aunt Jess, Diana. Even myself: there was the note I found under my pillow. Sometimes I thought I would start feeling it. As if one day I’d wake up and be