Superheroes Don't Eat Veggie Burgers Read Online Free

anyway.
    â€œSure, Dad,” I say. “Next year.”
    His face loosens. Standing up straight, he pats me on the back and then starts toward the door.
    â€œThat’s the spirit! Now, why don’t you get started on your homework? Your mom will be home soon, and then we’ll have dinner.” He turns around and grins at me. “You’re still in the mood for bacon lasagna, right?”
    I nod, then listen as his footsteps head down the hall toward Lucy’s room. I hear a light rap on her door. I press my palms against my ears, but her eardrum-splitting scream at the good news is unavoidable.
    Flopping backward onto my bed, I stare up at the ceiling and think about what Mr. P said earlier today.
    Words can be powerful. Believe in their magic and anything can happen.
    I sit up and reach for my backpack on the floor. Pulling out the science notebook, I flip to the first page and start writing.

    September 8
    The Adventures of Dude Explodius, Ruler of Everything
    By Charlie Burger
    Episode 1: The Greatest Dude Alive

    Even through the darkness that surrounded him, his superhuman vision allowed him to take it all in: the ten-story compound that had been built specifically for him, the regulation-size soccer field and dodgeball court where he always got to pick his team first, and the cozy cafeteria where seating was limited to a select few and his favorite foods were only a command away. Sitting on top of his custom-made beanbag chair, he smiled, satisfied that all was as it should be on Planet Splodii—his planet, his domain.
    He had too many powers to count. After all, he was not just a superhero—he was a super dude : Dude Explodius, Ruler of Everything.
    It didn’t get any better than that.
    He had ruled Planet Splodii for as long as anyone could remember. Stories of his remarkable strength, skill, and pure awesomeness were shared from generation to generation, not to mention his geniuslike intellect, amazing athleticism, and jaw-dropping good looks. Girls adored him, guys worshipped him, and any creature with half a brain knew to stay on his good side. That went for his enemies as well as the people of Splodii.
    He was, after all, a generous ruler.
    Except when forced to be otherwise.

 
    CHAPTER
    5
    When you live in a beach town, the best Saturdays of summer come after Labor Day.
    I wake up early and look around my room. My backpack sits next to my desk, where I dropped it after school yesterday. I pick it up and shove it into my closet. I’ve just made it through my first four days of middle school. I’m not planning on looking at that thing until Monday.
    Now that the tourists have all gone back to Boston and the lifeguards have all left for college, Franki and I will have the beach to ourselves—which is how we like it best. We’ll spend the morning checking out the tide pools and climbing the rock faces, since no one’s around to tell us not to. After lunch I’ll talk my dad into biking to Mill Pond with us, since his catering business slows way down after tourist season. We’ll hunt frogs in the marsh around the pond and fish for black crappies until it gets too dark to see our hooks and my dad starts worrying that someone is going to stick one through a finger. Franki did that once, and believe me, it wasn’t a pretty sight.
    I pick up a T-shirt off my floor and sniff it. Not bad, I decide, and pull it over my head. As I tiptoe past Lucy’s room, I pray she’s still asleep. Luckily, it works: Forty million stuffed animals stand sentry around the lump in her bed, and a thick trail of drool slides out of the corner of her mouth and onto her bright-pink pillowcase. I resist the urge to sneak in and dunk one of her curls into the slobber pool. If I wake her, my plans are toast.
    I bolt downstairs and inhale a bowl of Froot Loops before anyone’s awake. My dad thinks processed cereals are equivalent to poison, but my mom buys them anyway.