Stay Until We Break Read Online Free Page B

back.
    I lay back on the bed next to them with the weed and start rolling up joints, surprised at how good I still am at it. Like riding a bike. Diane never bothers to look up. I’m not sure she’s noticed I’m back. But Marilyn reaches for me and asks between breathless gasps if I like watching them, and hell yeah, of course I do. This is my favorite porn right here, live action. I love how these girls are together, how natural and unashamed they are. It’s not like anything I’ve ever seen up close and it’s hot as hell. I grab the lighter off the night table and light a joint and put it to Marilyn’s lips. She inhales and we exhale together as I watch her face and she starts to come, and oh hell yeah I’m hard. Very. I put my hand over my dick, thinking this is it, the moment my war story begins. But as Marilyn starts moaning louder and louder, instead of taking my dick out and getting the Trojan I keep in my wallet, I choke. Because all I keep thinking is Sunny is out there in the other room overhearing this, thinking I’m catching herpes.
    Goddamn it.
    I smoke the rest of the joint by myself and now I’m so baked, I don’t even remember putting it out. I don’t know where the roach is. I don’t remember the candle getting blown out. I don’t remember my pants coming off, or this blanket over me, or when exactly these two girls nestled in to either side of me.
    But it’s warm in here, so I stay.

Chapter Three
    Sonia
    “Coco,” Joey crows as we’re riding in Steady Beth, on our way to the diner for brunch. “Your wet dream finally comes true! Two hot women in one bed—we need an entry in the band scrapbook for this.”
    “There’s nothing scrapbook-worthy about it,” Cole says.
    “What, no photos?” Joey says. “That’s a shame. Hopefully next time.”
    “Actually, nothing happened,” Cole says, and we all burst out laughing at him, he’s so ridiculous, though my laugh is more of a scoff.
    “Well, did you at least see them naked?” Joey asks.
    Cole hesitates, and in that pause is all the information I need. I’m holding on to my notebook and about to tear it in half with the effort it’s taking to act cool about this.
    “Come on, it’s none of our business,” Travis says.
    “Everything is our business in the van,” Joey says. “So out with the details, Cole. Did they both suck your dick at the same time? Please say yes.”
    “That’s not even anatomically possible,” Cole points out. “And you’re a pig.”
    “But you’re not denying it,” he says.
    “Yes, I am denying it,” he says. “Flat out.”
    But now I don’t believe him. My mind is racing,
why, why, why
did I let Cole kiss me when I know what a player he is? I should have guessed he would have ditched me the minute something better came along—I’ve been down this road before. I agreed to the tour to help manage the band. To take care of the finances, the logistics. I didn’t sign on to be Cole’s safety hookup in case he can’t find anyone better—even two anyones at the same time. And I’m setting him straight on that score, the first chance I get.
    I watch his face in the rearview mirror, but I can’t see his eyes behind the dark sunglasses he’s wearing. I let out a long sigh and then regret it immediately when Cole whips his head around and takes his sunglasses off. His eyes are still red from his long, rough night. Poor baby.
    “What?” he asks.
    “What?” I answer.
    “What?” Emmy says, confused. “What’s wrong?”
    He keeps looking right at me, though, and now Emmy and Joey are both looking at me, too.
    “Nothing,” I say, because I am sure as shit not having this conversation now.
    “No secrets in Soft,” Emmy says. “Out with it.”
    “There’s nothing.” I try to act nonchalant, which is not easy with Cole looking like he’s expecting me to start an argument.
    “Then why are you giving Cole the Sunshine face?” Joey asks.
    “What the hell is that?”
    “‘Sunshine’ is