window, and now we were down at the empty reception hall on the ground floor, making our way towards the front door. Outside, through the blurred glass, we could both see the vague outline of press members shuffling back and forth, shouting nonsensical things as they waited for a sliver of an appearance or a statement on the love life of a person none of them knew. But these things sold, and people have to eat, don’t they?
Casey stood by my side before we got to the door – she looked just like herself, save for a larger pair of sunglasses retrieved from her bag and an enormous, rather unbefitting flowery wide-brimmed hat that was pulled down over her face.
I, on the other hand, was pretty much unrecognisable. My hair was tied up in a bun, the worst curtain-like blue and green dress you’ve ever seen in your life covering up the t-shirt and jeans beneath it, and a hat similar to Casey’s covering my face.
Why, you might ask?
‘Trust me, you look exactly like your typical grandmother type-person, nobody’s gonna know it’s you.’
‘This is still madness,’ I said, ‘And if this hat blows off or something they’re all gonna think I’ve had some kind of nervous breakdown in the wake of last night, like I’ve aged fifty years or something. Can you imagine the headlines?’
‘ ‘A-Lister Emma Clarke to star as octogenarian mother of love-struck triplets in new romantic comedy’.’
‘Oh, shut up…’
We had packed everything into one bag that Casey was now pulling along behind her on wheels. This was the image we were going for – young granddaughter escorting her frail grandmother to a cab.
‘I’ll be honest, when I woke up this morning I did not anticipate that we were gonna get to wear disguises… This is the most fun I’ve had in-’
I looked over at Casey with a flat, unamused expression from beneath my hat. She tried to hold back her laugh.
‘Just treat it like one of your parts,’ she said, ‘it’s just like a scene in of your movies!’
‘Believe me, I’m beginning to feel more and more like that as the days go by…’
‘Okay, here we go. Ready?’
‘Ready…’ I sighed, hooking my arm around Casey’s and crooning myself over to look as close to the part as possible, making sure to keep my head down.
Casey hit the button on the wall by the door, clasping her hand around the handle and pulling the door open as it buzzed and clicked, and we stepped out into the early afternoon sun.
A wall of noise suddenly hit us, I keeping my head as low as possible and shuffling by Casey’s side as we made our way through the crowd.
‘Out of the way people, out of the way!’ Casey screamed, ‘What, are you just gonna stand around and get in the way of my poor old grandma?’
I struggled to stifle my laughter from beneath the hat, shuffling along with slow haste as we made our way to the edge of the sidewalk. All I could see were pairs of feet in sneakers, camera leads and equipment bags. Around me I caught the occasional wisp of sound or the end of a conversation or reading in front of a camera-
‘ Everyone is wondering just what Miss Clarke’s response is to this situation-’
‘-hasn’t been seen since this morning-’
‘—love life covered extensively in the media-’
I clenched my eyes shut for a moment, trying to keep a hold on myself as we made for the cab. I didn’t quite know how to feel, but for some reason the ridiculousness of this whole situation hit me, and I couldn’t help but smile.
‘We’re nearly there…’ Casey whispered out of the edge of her mouth, before I saw the yellow paint of the cab come into view. ‘Jump in, quickly, I’ll get the bag…’
I let go of Casey’s arm and near enough dived into the cab after pulling the door open – pretty uncharacteristic for an elderly woman.
Seconds later she came hurtling in through the passenger door on the other side of the cab, slamming it shut behind her before patting the back of the drivers