be thebeginnings of words that she doesnât know quite how to finish.
Eleanor pulls the door to her closet open, and thereâs nothing inside but one of Astridâs dioramas. Not even a very good one. Itâs a basic park scene: aluminum-foil pond, green construction-paper grass, toothpicks with green pom-poms on top for trees. Orange Play-Doh dots that are meant to look like goldfish swimming in the reflective pond. Tissue-paper roses. Itâs pretty vanilla for Astrid, who usually likes her diorama trees pink and her diorama ponds covered in glitter.
âDo you like it?â Astrid says. I donât know if she means the diorama or the way theyâve positioned it in the middle of the closet. I shrug. âLike, is it a place youâd want to visit?â
âItâs a park,â I say, which isnât an answer. âItâs a nice park,â I amend, not wanting to say the wrong thing.
Astrid steps into the closet. Eleanor steps in beside her. Marlaâs next, and itâs a pretty tight squeeze. Iâm not sure thereâs room for one more.
I step inside and Eleanor closes the door. It goes dark and I close my eyes, a funny reflex I have when a room goes black.
Marla starts to giggle. Hearing Marla giggle is so new and strange I wonder if sheâs choking before realizing what the sound is. My eyes open because of the smell of roses. Itâs strong.Overwhelming. I wonder if Eleanorâs secret boyfriend has bought her some new perfume that sheâs spraying like crazy.
Thatâs not it, though.
The ground is covered in green and yellow spikes of grass. At my feet thereâs a glassy pool of water. A small pond. I think I even see little orange fish swimming around right beneath the surface. I rub my eyes. There are roses everywhere, growing right out of the ground and not in bushes. We are in a very pretty park, the size of a baseball field.
I donât understand the things Iâm seeing.
âWeâre in a park,â I say. My feet wonât move, and my sisters donât look confused enough, given whatâs happening.
âThis is the best itâs ever been, isnât it?â Astrid says to Marla and Eleanor. Eleanor nods and her eyes widen, but Marla shrugs, unconvinced.
âItâs probably a good diorama,â Marla says, her voice tight and fast, not leaving any room for other theories.
âMaybe all four of us together make the closet stronger,â Astrid says. âWe should have brought Priscilla in earlier.â The sunâs bouncing off the pond and her white-blond hair and the tips of our noses.
âCautious is good,â Eleanor says, but sheâs glowing in the sun too, and her jaw and elbows and shoulders look looser.
âWhat happened?â My voice screeches. Theyâre all too calm. âHow are we in a park? Is it . . . a time machine? Is this what you do? You go to parks? How do theyâ What do theyââ I was so gung ho about having an adventure that I hadnât considered the way an adventure actually feelsâprickly and terrifying. I want desperately to hold on to something steady, but nothing feels real or anchored here. âHelp me understand.â
âWe bring in the dioramas,â Marla says. I can tell sheâs trying to make it sound like sheâs done it a million times before, even though last night was the first time. âAnd they become real.â
I start laughing, because it is a completely insane conversation that weâre having.
âSo Astridâs magical?â I say, thinking of the way her hands move so gracefully when sheâs making the dioramas. Thereâs some magic there.
âThe closets are,â Marla says.
â This closet makes dioramas real,â Eleanor says, âbut Astridâs closet doesnât work.â She crosses her arms over her chest. âThis is the magic closet. The others arenât, okay?â