Rock Me Harder (Rock Star Rockstar Erotic Romance) (Rock Me #2) Read Online Free Page B

then it seems. I would notice him walking down the hallway and quickly move into whatever door was closest to me, or if I was backstage with the band I would practically lock myself in Christian’s dressing room where I knew there was no chance Jared would enter.
    It was like a constant cloud of guilt, fear and sadness washed over me. I don’t know how else to describe it. I’d never felt anything like it before in my life. On top of everything, I felt completely powerless to stop anything. I couldn’t change my mom’s opinion, I knew that. She was as stubborn as a mule, and always had been. If she thought Christian was bad for me, and she wanted me to move back to America, nothing I was going to say was going to change her mind about it. I just had to keep ignoring her, and keep feeling guilty about doing so.
    With Jared, there was nothing I could do. I had to hope that he got the message, I had to hope that he understood that there was no chance we would ever be together, no chance that I was ever going to leave Christian for him. But again, in this situation, there was nothing I could do.
    This wasn’t a healthy existence, and I think Christian noticed.
    “Hey, I thought I’d take you out on one last date in Ireland before we fly out to France in a couple of days. How does that sound?”
    “That sounds amazing” I replied with a smile. And it did; Christian and I hadn’t been on a proper date in a few weeks.
    “I’m glad, you’re just looking a little bit down lately and I hope I can make you feel better. How about we just take a drive out into the country, and have a nice picnic along the cliffs?”
    “I honestly can’t think of anything better.”
    The thought of our upcoming date actually kept me going for the next few days. The next day was the last concert date, then the band had a day off before we all flew to Paris, while the stage crews took the ferry back to England and then across to France. It was on that day off that we were going to go on our date.
    I went out to buy the stuff for our picnic, Christian and I agreeing that we would meet back at the hotel at around six, where he would have a convertible waiting to drive us out to the countryside, to the famous cliffs of Ireland where we would enjoy dinner by the sea. I was giddy with excitement as I picked out bread, wine, cheese, a quiche and a nice little fruit tart to be our picnic meal.
    By the time I got back to the hotel it was five past six. I couldn’t wait for our date, and as I was in the parking lot I looked around for the convertible, although I didn’t see any. I wasn’t worried; it could’ve been in any of hundreds of different places around the hotel. But when I got back to our room and it was empty, then I began to worry. I looked around, but couldn’t see him. I dug out my phone and called him, but there was no reply. I went down the hall and found Andrea, but she hadn’t seen Christian at all. Eventually I came across a security guard who said he’d seen Christian leaders a little while ago, but that he hadn’t come back.
    As much as I tried to force the thought from my mind, I began to realize that I’d been stood up. There was no other explanation. I was sad, angry, annoyed, basically every negative emotion it was possible for a human being to feel, I felt in that moment. I was devastated. This was going to be our special date, and I was stood up. Why would Christian do this to me? Surely there had to be a good explanation for this. I called him again, but again there was no answer.
    I went back into our hotel room and began to cry. The more the tears streamed from my eyes, the better I felt. It was relaxing, it was therapeutic. I still felt terrible, but the tears helped. I opened the bottle of wine that I bought, expecting to share it with Christian, and began to drink straight from the bottle. I ended up eating my half of our picnic, right there in the middle of our hotel room, on the floor while getting drunk on