died from cancer.” A sigh left her lips. “Anyway, I can’t tell how tall Noah is—he was sitting. But I bet he’s a big guy. He definitely had those. . .big. . .muscular shoulders, not that I noticed.”
Careful. I’ve got other big things too.
“MJ,” Fuji said. “Tell me another joke.”
MJ? We’re on a fucking nickname basis now?
“Umm. . .so before I do that. I have a question,” she said.
“Shoot.”
Her voice came out shaky. “So. . .do you think I’m going to be safe?”
“You keep asking me that. I’m telling you. Noah don’t kill women and kids, unless he really has to.”
What else have you been telling her, Fuji?
She still didn’t sound convinced. “Okay.”
“Give me another joke,” Fuji begged.
“Alrighty.” Her voice rose in my loft. “Okay. So a packed plane takes off. There’s tons of people and luggage on it, so the plane is having difficulty staying in the air. Too much weight.”
“Oh this is going to be good,” Fuji said. “People are going to die in this joke, right?!”
“No, and I’m going to need you to calm down.”
“Okay, sorry,” Fuji said. “Go ahead.”
Sorry? Go ahead? Are you fucking rubbing her feet and serving tea and crumpets too?
I opened the door a few inches. My place sat above the club. A three bedroom and two bath apartment with all the luxuries that any man would desire—state of the art entertainment system, plush leather, soft carpeting, a bed for a beast, and a kitchen to play in whenever I felt like indulging in making a meal.
At the door, a long hallway led into the main living room. Instead of walking down there, I leaned back and decided to see how much trouble Fuji would be in after this evening.
Mary Jane continued, “So this plane is close to crashing due to the weight. They shove off all of the suitcases. Just sling them out of the plane. It rises a little, but everyone is scared. The pilot gets on the speaker and with a sad voice says, ‘The plane is too heavy to fly and we won’t be able to land without killing us all. We’ll have to start throwing people off the plane, but don’t worry we have parachutes.’”
“Oh yes.” Fuji clapped. “Someone’s going to die.”
“Stop it. No one’s dying in this joke,” she huffed. “The pilot continues to say, ‘We want to be fair, when we throw people out of the plane, so what we will do is start with the alphabet. Can all of the African Americans stand up, grab a parachute, and please jump off the plane?’”
Fuji laughed.
In the hallway, I shook my head.
“No one stands up,” she said. “So the pilot goes to the next letter, ‘Can all of the Black people please stand up and jump off the plane.’ Again, everyone is silent and seated. So then, he goes to the letter C, ‘Can all of the Colored people, please stand up and jump off the plane.’”
“This is good,” Fuji admitted.
Maybe, you can be her manager, after I maim and fire you.
“So in the far back of the plane,” Mary Jane said. “A little black boy sits with his mother and tugs her sleeve. ‘Mama,’ he whispers, ‘Why haven’t we stood? Aren’t we African American? Aren’t we Black? Aren’t we Colored?” His mother just stares down at him and shakes her head. ‘No, baby,’ she says, ‘We’re Niggers today.’”
“Oh shit!” Fuji clapped some more. “That’s so fucked up, but so awesome too.”
A fucking smile cracked onto my face, but I wiped that shit off real fast. I didn’t have time for jokes or this chick. I had a friend to find and kill, before the streets started to wonder if I still controlled everything.
“Yeah. That’s your best one right there.” Fuji clapped again.
“I know right?” She giggled. “But, for some reason that joke just doesn’t go well in most audiences.”
“Oh, fuck them!” Fuji exclaimed. “Some people get too hung up on racism.”
He clapped some more and I chose that moment to join his clapping while stepping into the